How awkward?

13 posts Page 1 of 1

 

User avatar
Shining
Posts: 27023
by Shining » Wed Jan 13, 2010 5:38 am
I feel that in an IVA sometimes situations can be awkward, I'm more assertive than hubby and don't mind saying 'no I don't want to go/do it' or 'sorry can't afford it', it's something I've learnt to do whilst being in an IVA with ease.

However, last night hubby returns from work and tells me his boss came out to him and asked him for a tenner to go towards a colleagues retirement present, well this I kind of understand, however as a lot of you will appreciate a tenner is a tenner and can do a lot for us in IVA's/DMP's or bankruptcy.

Next we're having a do at this place and it's £20 a head do I put you and your Mrs down as coming?....he don't think as quick as me and guess what the sting was it's on the 29th! £40 for a do and £10 for a present, bring me £50 tomorrow!....

Excuse me while I go get it from my secret stash of money! We've managed the tenner and he's going in to lie to him today but it's so awkward for him as they've cut his workforce to 6 workers and he's lucky to still be in employment but we can't warrant £50 on a night out and to be fair if I could I would begrudge every penny as if I was spending that money I'd want to choose who I was spending the time with!

I've been up since 4am again worrying and fretting about this as per usual! Hubby sleeping like a baby!

 

User avatar
Wizzzard
Posts: 1595
by Wizzzard » Wed Jan 13, 2010 6:34 am
Don't worry Lesley .... just apologise and say 'No thank you, you have other plans'. It's not as if you have had plenty of warning is it?

 

User avatar
Shining
Posts: 27023
by Shining » Wed Jan 13, 2010 6:38 am
Oh Wizz, thanks, I'm just sat here feeling really bad and all kinds of things going through my head, I tend to do this I know make a mountain out of a molehill but just sat evaluating why I'm in an IVA etc., etc., how much mortgage we're paying as opposed to what could be rent and without all the added expense of repairs etc., funny how little things like an invite out can get you to down to this level.

 

User avatar
Julie
Posts: 9503
by Julie » Wed Jan 13, 2010 7:20 am
I agree with Wizz, Lesley don't worry yourself over it and say you've already got plans for that date. Personally as the boss has been making redundancies its a bit of a cheek expecting the litle staff he has left to shell out £50 at a drop of a hat - you'd think he'd foot the bill himself as a goodwill gesture [:)]

Just focus on the IVA won't last forever, you've overcome plenty of challenges so far and survived, so don't let having to say no to a night out with hubbys work colleagues worry you. I bet hubby didn't want to go anyway [;)]

xx

 

User avatar
Shining
Posts: 27023
by Shining » Wed Jan 13, 2010 7:44 am
Thanks Julie, I think I've probably had a bout 8 hours sleep since last Saturday and it can make me irrational at times and I think when I posted that it was a 'woe is me' post. Ignore me I do get over it and only feel like this now and then.

Other people have far more serious things to worry about than me but at the time when you're lonely and it's 4am it does seem a big deal honest.

Cyber hug to all my lovely forum friends for support and guidance always appreciated.

 

User avatar
Julie
Posts: 9503
by Julie » Wed Jan 13, 2010 7:59 am
I know how you feel Lesley - I'm not sleeping well and everything seems a zillion times worse in the early hours of the morning. Last night i tried a different ploy and imagined I'd won the lottery - I was getting right into it, from my phoning camelot down to where I was going to move to......ah it was fun while it lasted [:D]

 

User avatar
Shining
Posts: 27023
by Shining » Wed Jan 13, 2010 8:03 am
I might give that a try Julie, hope you get some sleep soon, it really is a horrible feeling of being tired all the time but can't sleep!

I'm off to work again soon till 5pm and then tomorrow I'm working straight through till 8pm with a drive home it'll be probably 9pm when I get in as we've got an open evening for potential students for September intake...I actually enjoy marketing which I why I volunteer and when our new college is built in my home town I plan on trying for a place in marketing and taking some courses/qualifications in it maybe.

 

User avatar
Julie
Posts: 9503
by Julie » Wed Jan 13, 2010 9:29 am
You should definitely do Marketing Lesley, it'll be another string to your bow!

I'm considering changing my career - just don't know what to?!

 

User avatar
kallis3
Forum Expert
Posts: 71966
Contact
by kallis3 » Wed Jan 13, 2010 4:51 pm
Just caught up with this. What are our hubby's like eh?

I hope he has gone and told them that you have other plans which he had forgotten about. £50 is a lot when you can't afford it.

 

User avatar
Shining
Posts: 27023
by Shining » Wed Jan 13, 2010 7:54 pm
Thanks all, he went to work and told them the truth, we couldn't afford it and I admire him for that to be honest. I've taken some Valerian tonight which is supposed to calm me and help me sleep so let's see if it works!

 

User avatar
kallis3
Forum Expert
Posts: 71966
Contact
by kallis3 » Wed Jan 13, 2010 8:41 pm
Hope it does Lesley.

 

User avatar
Julie
Posts: 9503
by Julie » Wed Jan 13, 2010 8:44 pm
Good for hubby! One less thing to worry about Lesley [:)]

Don't forget when you're struggling to sleep, imagine the lottery win [:D] Hope you get some zzzzzz's tonight [;)]

 

User avatar
Shining
Posts: 27023
by Shining » Wed Jan 13, 2010 8:46 pm
Julie have you tried Valerian, I've had it before and whether it's in my head or what it stops me stressing and I do get some restful sleep? My friend told me about it as she's into all things herbal, I got them mainly to keep her quiet but for me they're good or they were last time I took them. x
13 posts Page 1 of 1
Return to “friends corner”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest