Will my partner find out about my IVA?

Get expert opinion. This is the place for new questions to be posted.
12 posts Page 1 of 1

Bubbly

Posts: 20
Joined: Thu Nov 01, 2018 12:11 pm

Post by Bubbly » Wed Aug 07, 2019 7:06 am
I'm planning to move in with partner soon. I have notified IVA and they are sending income and expenditure form to me. My question is.. My partner doesn't know about IVA so when he notifies the council about me living there will he find out from them?

kallis3

User avatar
Forum Expert
Posts: 75205
Joined: Mon Mar 17, 2008 4:02 pm
Location: United Kingdom

Post by kallis3 » Wed Aug 07, 2019 7:23 am
They won't find out from the council but I strongly recommend you tell your partner as it's not easy to keep these things secret. Your IVA company may want to know their income and expenditure and your payments may go up.
Sharing from experiences of dealing with debt
The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.
Bob Marley.
http://kallis3.blogs.iva.co.uk

Bubbly

Posts: 20
Joined: Thu Nov 01, 2018 12:11 pm

Post by Bubbly » Wed Aug 07, 2019 11:43 am
Hi

Thank you for replying.

I can't tell him or he will more than likely finish me for keeping it away from him this long, I should have told him from the beginning. They said they will send me a new income and expenditure form but my expenses will stay the same as I told him I can't afford more than what I pay at my parents house.

kallis3

User avatar
Forum Expert
Posts: 75205
Joined: Mon Mar 17, 2008 4:02 pm
Location: United Kingdom

Post by kallis3 » Wed Aug 07, 2019 11:52 am
You may find it hard to keep mail from him and phone calls. They may want to see his income to make sure he is paying his fair share of the bills. You also need to make sure you have no joint financial dealings.
Sharing from experiences of dealing with debt
The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.
Bob Marley.
http://kallis3.blogs.iva.co.uk

Bubbly

Posts: 20
Joined: Thu Nov 01, 2018 12:11 pm

Post by Bubbly » Wed Aug 07, 2019 11:54 am
I probably need to have a sit down chat with him at some point then. We have no joint finances

Jessie91

Posts: 164
Joined: Fri Jul 19, 2019 12:47 pm

Post by Jessie91 » Wed Aug 07, 2019 2:34 pm
I would advise you tell your partner. My husband was told the minute I even thought about iva and the support really helps and having that person to talk to about it all. It’s only me in the Iva but they did ask for my husbands bank statement etc. Just to get a idea of all money coming in and out and what for.
It’s going to be hard for you but your feel better once spoken about it. My husband is the only person that knows I’m in a iva and stay that way.

kallis3

User avatar
Forum Expert
Posts: 75205
Joined: Mon Mar 17, 2008 4:02 pm
Location: United Kingdom

Post by kallis3 » Wed Aug 07, 2019 2:48 pm
I hid our money problems from hubby for months and felt much better once it was out in the open.
Sharing from experiences of dealing with debt
The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.
Bob Marley.
http://kallis3.blogs.iva.co.uk

Bubbly

Posts: 20
Joined: Thu Nov 01, 2018 12:11 pm

Post by Bubbly » Wed Aug 07, 2019 2:51 pm
I talk to my sister about it but my partner is very against debt and has strong views on it so I know we won't last because of it. How come they will ask about his finances but they didn't ask about parents as I live with them now? I will be paying rent money to him as I do with then

Foggy

User avatar
Forum Expert
Posts: 29874
Joined: Fri Dec 17, 2010 11:14 am
Location: United Kingdom

Post by Foggy » Wed Aug 07, 2019 3:02 pm
Wed Aug 07, 2019 2:51 pmBubbly wrote:
I talk to my sister about it but my partner is very against debt and has strong views on it so I know we won't last because of it. How come they will ask about his finances but they didn't ask about parents as I live with them now? I will be paying rent money to him as I do with then
If you tell them that you are living together as a couple they will need to see his income to apportion the household expenses between you. Far easier to say that you are house sharing, so you pay an agreed amount towards the house, in the same way as you do with your parents. They may need to see evidence of this.
My opinions are merely that .. opinions based on experience. Always seek professional advice.
IVA Completed 23rd July 2013 .... C.C. 10th January 2014
http://foggy.blogs.iva.co.uk

Bubbly

Posts: 20
Joined: Thu Nov 01, 2018 12:11 pm

Post by Bubbly » Wed Aug 07, 2019 3:07 pm
Makes sense. Thank you

abbiesmum2003

User avatar
Posts: 878
Joined: Sun Dec 02, 2012 8:50 pm
Location:

Post by abbiesmum2003 » Wed Aug 07, 2019 9:19 pm
I know you shouldnt judge relationships but it concerns me how stable it is if you fear it will end if you confess a mistake but one you are taking action for to correct.
A relationship is built on trust and honesty. And to keep this a secret will be very hardwork for you.
Yhere will be many hurdles to get over in your future not just financial amd if you fear he will finish with you but being open and honest with him about this how can you be sure how he would react to other challenges and situations.
Me and my husband knew we both had debt but neither of us knew to what extent (was about £48,000 in the end!!!)
But these 6 years have bought us closer together. Weve learnt to work together and budget and be open and talk...not tread on eggshells fearing what the other might find out.
not the basis for a firm relationship.
Be brave and honest. It will make things much easier in the future if things get difficult to manage.
Best of luck and I hope he has the maturity to see the IVa as a positive action to a better financial future.

Mrs_Brown

User avatar
Posts: 160
Joined: Wed Jan 03, 2018 5:06 am

Post by Mrs_Brown » Thu Aug 08, 2019 5:49 am
I told my partner about it on one of our very early dates, otherwise I would have just been worrying. Turned out he had been through it himself! You may find that the reason he's very against debt is because he has had problems himself in the past. But if you think you won't last when he knows, it is probably better to make sure he does know before you move in, if he finds out at a later time it could become a much more messy situation. His reaction may not be what you think. But I would say definitely get it out now. Thinking forwards if he didn't know, what if you end up wanting to buy a house together? And he finds out at that stage.
12 posts Page 1 of 1
Return to “Ask IVA Forum and Industry experts”