www.iva.co.uk

I'm writing this post as much as anything else to push myself towards taking steps to sort out my debt problem. I know that this site is anonymous, but the very act of having to sit down and think through where I am and what options are available to me is a positive step all by itself.

My debts are huge and rising - £120k+ and I'm running out of available cash after being made redundant last year. I've got no job and know I ant afford to stay where I'm living now. I've been stuck wondering about what to do first - get a job ( even if much lower paid than I had) get somewhere more affordable to rent or to go straight to one of the recommended advisers mentioned regularly on this site who can tell me if I have a chance to avoid bankruptcy with an IVA. Are my debts just too large for that?

The way I've been keeping my head buried in the sand has been irresponsible and I'm increasingly ashamed at my own stupidity.

Just waiting for some creditor to take legal action against me isn't the solution - I know that. This weekend I'm going to start the process of opening and filing all my unopened mail from the last 2 months, just to see how bad things are. Once I've got that information I'll be able, on Monday morning, to make that/those first difficult telephone call(s) to (an) advisor(s) recommended on this site to take the first steps towards getting my life back under control. I know that things will get worse for me - maybe much worse - before they begin to get any better. But I've only got myself to blame for the situation I'm in.

I'm scared. Scared of how low I'm going to fall. Scared that I may end up homeless. Scared just how bad things will get for me. But reading posts on this site shows me that there can be hope, that people can make a new life with problems and situations far worse than my own. But first I've got to screw up the courage to face up to reality and to take those first steps towards getting myself out of the mess I've created.

Sorry if I've droned on for too long. My life's descending into a nightmare that I've got to face up to. Writing this post, even though it's anonymous, just helps me to stop burying my head in the sand and to start taking the action I should have done ages ago. Even though I should have done this before, that's no excuse to keep putting this off - its better now than later.

Signed: a stupid, feckless, irresponsible man who's only just facing up to his previous state of denial.

Hello, welcome and well done!

You have done the hardest part and faced up to the impending situation. Once you make that first phone call things will start to get much easier. If you go for an IVA it will not be an easy path, not will it be purgatory.

I would suggest you chat to a couple of the smaller, independent, firms where you will be seen as a person, rather than a grain of sand on a very large beach. They will not force you into an IVA but will present the solutions open to you for your own circumstances and you will make the choice.

Hi and well done for taking the first steps. I wholeheartedly agree with Foggy about firms to seek advice from too.

For what it's worth, and I know it doesn't feel like it now, but taking charge and pulling my head out of the sand ended up being a liberating experience. I felt in control for the first time in a long time. Once our IVA was in place our lives, whilst frugle, were manageable and there was no more fearing the post or phone calls.

Don't beat yourself up over getting to this point, we all have our demons about how we ended up here but that won't fix the problem and any company you speak to won't judge as they have seen it all and far far higher debts before.

You will be fine and I know that by taking charge of things you will find a way through.

It's scary I know but I am so very glad we did it and you are in the right place to go into this with the full back up of the forum who have been a godsend to me over these years.

I was in the same position as you 7 years ago. You will get there as I am now living proof as I have completed my journey. It's not easy and you will have good days and bad days but you will get through it. I felt exactly like you and felt that I would be judged for how stupid I had been but there is help out there. Keep smiling and take each day as it comes.

Thank you Foggy, Til & Penny for your kind supporting comments. I just have to hold my nerve for 36 hours and make those first calls on Monday Morning.

Hi and welcome from myself too, admitting to yourself you need help is a huge leap forward and from hereon you can get that all important advice you need to move towards a debt free future whatever that solution may be. By talking to the experts the best way can be found for you. Keep in touch with the forum, we offer superb support and with experts posting often excellent advice too.

You are not alone . Most of us will have faced the same anger at our own failings for allowing ourselves to get into such a mess. However there is hope . There is always a solution. Pick up the phone and talk to some of the agencies mentioned on the forum ...there is a lot of help out there .Congratulations for taking the first step .

You are being too hard on yourself and no one will judge you. Get some free advice and choose the option best for you that allows you to restart and move on. You have done nothing wrong and the debt problem can be solved.

As with all things, admitting you need help is the major hurdle. The only way is up from here. Call a few people, there are many solutions and you need the right one for you. We went with cleardebt who were fantastic for us. Melanie Giles and Michael Peoples come highly praised by many on here too. All advice is free.

Me and my wife were in your position just over 6 year's ago
With similar debts around the same figure !
I personally would advise you speak with Melanie giles or one of her team
they certainly helped us
Six years later a fresh start...

Good luck [:)]

Congratulations on taking the first step, it's the hardest. Don't beat yourself up too much, most of us on the forum have been where you are now. Iva is not an easy solution but it's very worthwhile and life will be so much less stressful when you start-no more unopened post and heart hammering every time the phone rings. There is a better life out there when you have your debt problems resolved. Go for one of the smaller firms, they seem to be more customer orientated. You've made the best start by finding this forum, unfortunately we didn't find it until year 4 of our iva, the posters on here are full of wonderful advice and will cheer you up when you need it. Good luck.

Can't say anything different to the above...apart from we are here on the forum not to judge you in anyway. The majority of us have been in very similar positions and have come out the other side much better off and better people!
We are here to other you support, a kick up the backside when you need it and as a sounding board if frustrations get too much ... your not alone!

You ask if you should find a job. Well, an IVA needs you to detail your income and expenditure(rent, council tax etc) as a first step. Any surplus goes to the arrangement and pays off a proportion of your debt. If you don't have a job do you have other income to declare? On the question of who to go to just beware there are some sharks out there. Turn away anyone who is too pushy. An established Insolvency Practitioner is best. I hope it works out for you. We have all been there, suddenly realising how our debts crept up on us, putting it off, robbing Peter to pay Paul. For me the IVA was preferable to bankruptcy but it is a long slog. Are you up for that?