www.iva.co.uk

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Hi Markvi,

It sounds like you are having a tough time, but no one on here will judge you and there are lots of people going through the same thing.

The fact that you have some disposable income would indicate the fact that you are just about keeping your head above water, i myself when i entered into an iva was robbing peter to pay paul so to speak and had 0 disposable income. If you are able to make your repayments and have a bit left over to live from i would think carefully - as an iva lasts 5 years, could yoour circumstances change in the next year or so in terms of work and income? Becuase if they might then you wont be struggling so much and you may then regret going into an IVA.

Bear in mind also that the whole idea of an IVA is you pay back everything you can afford to, so the only money you will be left with every month will be money for basic living.

Not sure if that helps at all but the weight of debt and especially not telling loved ones is very hard, i know as i had to go through it alone as well, you just need to make the decision whether to tell them or not and then strive forward with whatever decision you make to resolve the debt, there is always a way, its not easy but there is always a way.

Take care

Hi and welcome
An IVA may well be a suitable solution for you, your family debt would have to be included so you will not be able to carry no paying them 100 pounds. Speak with several experts/companies and talk through all you options, if an IVA is not suitable for you then you may find a debt management plan will be.
Regards

Hi and welcome

I recommend that you speak to a professional.

Visit www.iva.com for a list of companies and reviews. Give one or two a ring and you will receive free and impartial advice as to all the options open to you and the best solution for your circumstances.

You would be suprised at the number of client who come to me for advice and tell me that they cannot tell their husband/wife. It is always advisable to share problems with your life partner, and once the courage is plucked up the partner is generally very reassuring and understanding despite your current concerns.

I advocate that a problem shared is a problem solved - and with support from your partner and good professional advice which is readily available to you both on and off the forum, you will soon see things in a more positive light - and I do think that an IVA would work as solution for you based on the facts you have currently disclosed. Make sure you look at other options too, which an insolvency practitioner would be able to help you with.

hi markvi
your story is very simular to mine. owe approx 40k kept in from wife to protect her and her feelings, she became a housewife looking after our 2 beautiful children. borrowed money on c/c and loans to improve the house 5 years ago dropped to one income bigger mortgage etc etc. plucked up the courage to tell her about the debt and the last 8 months of gamberling trying to pay back the payments on c/c with some of the winnings and majour losses what a fool i am. the big bubble burst in my head nowhere to hide and run and told my wife the lot. she was upset and hurt and then the hurt turned to anger and bitterness. she now wants to walk away from the marriage. i begged her not to that i needed support and help from her. she closed the door in my face and had every right too. whilst my marriage is over i am so pleased i told her and her family the problems i had day to day. you mentioned about the gambling wasn't an addiction i didn't think it was for me either untill i faced facts that it was because i was depressed and unhappy with the debts and more so with the marriage as you look at it in more depth. be brave look at who you are and get it off your chest. the debts aren't going away soon but you need to have a plan in place to deal with this. if your wife truely loves you yes she will be mad but you need to know if she is going to stand by you. and when she does pick up the phone to a good I.P and get rid of the debt as quickly and cost effective as you can. Mels team was there for me when i made the phone call i had hit rock bottom and i mean rock bottom. i have not entered into the iva as yet because i could be losing my job but when clear i shall be speaking to MG team they picked me off the floor when i had no one else to turn to. as regards the gambling take a trip too GA this will open your eyes believe me you had an addition but didn't know. good luck

I kept things from my husband for a long time, and I was under great stress trying to hide everything.

Once it came out in the open, although it made him ill at the time, it was a huge weight off my shoulders.

We're a much stronger couple now and have no secrets from each other.

Jan that is a lovely post.

We both knew of our position so it was easy to recognise we were in trouble it was making the first move that took our time. x

markvi - can you please not delete posts once replies have been made. It is against forum etiquette and makes all replies look silly.

Hi Markvi,

I didn't see your original post, but just wanted to echo what Helen says really. [:)]

Hope to see you back soon xx

Apologies for deleting, didn't want to go against forum etiquette, but wanted to try and remove username and choose another that i would feel more anonymous with.

No worries markvi, did you manage a name change to preserve your anonymity? if not you could always let us know and we can always see what we can do with contacting admin. x

Andy may well pick up on this and contact him to see about getting a name change.