apoligies

[Skippy]

I don't know, a few days away and I miss all the excitement!!!

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is the present - a gift to make the most of.

View my blog at http://skippy13.blogs.iva.co.uk/

[tracy.h]

Thanks every one,i think to be honest when i read daz's last post i felt so upset that he was so negative about what people were trying to say,i felt so much loyalty to the posters on this forum,and how much we have all been through and still going through maybe i was a little harsh with my comments,when really i should have felt compassion for his predicament.
I must admit i do try and give the utmost honest advise that i feel will help,and im no expert,but ive been through the wars myself and i can understand the sheer desperation that people feel when they are desperate,and i offer my advise on my own experiences,in hope that i can offer them support.
I will continue posting because for maybe the one person that maybe takes what we say as negative,theres the rest that appreciate the time and effort that all of us spend in trying to make a difference,by offering our advise because we are all trying to ease there suffering with our sincere words,and the experts ,who dont have to post do because like us they care
Thanks again for all your kind words xx

[tracy.h]

Hope you enjoyed the lovely wheather Skippy.x

[Andy2]

I too was upset at Daz's reactions but I just put myself in his shoes....he had a very steep learning curve to still go through. He had not yet faced his creditors about defaulting and was doing his I and E in anticipation. I advised him not to include £30 a month pocket money for his two teenage sons (13 and 16) as the creditors would not sanction this and would expect them to get paper rounds. However he more or less told me to keep my stupid suggestions to myself. Fair enough but I was only trying to help him. I might be wrong - creditors might be a lot more accommodating with what they allow in return for freezing interest and charges and not pursuing court actions. Daz's situation was also compounded by him owing his sister £25,000 and he had to keep paying this in full in preference to his creditors. Again I could see the need for him to do that, but advised him if that were the case his creditors will expect him to live on the breadline and not a penny more. Andy D had made perfectly helpful suggestions about balance transfers to 0% and a remortgage but again we were told to keep negative comments to ourselves. Again though I feel for Daz because he had obviously not (yet) been confronted as a defaulting debtor and had not yet had the wind taken out of him by his creditors. It might be he does not post again but as least he will have learnt a bit of what to expect. I know what you mean about being through the wars, I feel the same way. I had no idea a forum like this existed and had to deal with my debts and creditors without knowing a thing.

[Skippy]

From what I could make out Andy your posts were fine. The idea of an IVA is to repay as much as you can, so therefore you have to live on the breadline. We're all here to offer support for each other, and we have all had different experiences, which is why the forum works so well. If you don't mind me asking Andy, are you in an IVA, or does your expertise and sound advice come from somewhere else?

Glad you're going to keep posting Tracy - I'd miss you if you went! It's good to have another Tracey on the forum! I had a really nice time and we had really good weather - we went to Dave's mum's place on the South Coast and we're going back for the bank holiday as well. We have to work when we are there to keep the place going (it's starting to fall down!) but we're lucky to be able to go there.

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is the present - a gift to make the most of.

View my blog at http://skippy13.blogs.iva.co.uk/

[Andy2]

I'm not in an IVA but Andy D was - I should perhaps change my name or stop posting [:)]

[scaredkez]

guys, i wouldn't cut yourselves up over it, he came on seeking advice, we could only give the advice of our own experiences and what we have been told and learnt from the technical experts, i don't feel anyone gave negative advice but constructive advice on what you have all learnt yourselves going down the iva path.
unfortunatley for him he had not had the creditors hounding him for his blood yet and this will come and he will realise where all of us were coming from, i feel for him in regards to his sister, and owing that money to her as what ever root he takes this will have to be included as no creditor can be seen as being treated preferentially, and that is also the case in BR and they can seek that money back which would be an awful predicament to put himself into, whoever he goes to for help will only reiterate the advice given on here.
i understand he was desperate and hope that he does post again as he will learn what this forum is all about, we are here to help and support in what ever way we can, so guys give all of yourselves a pat on the back, for giving the time and support as usual, we will see many posters like this, desperation takes us all in different ways and no two stories are the same.
so keep up the good work and don't be put off by one poster who certainly at present is in limbo to his own situation.
kerri

Please view my blog at: http://scaredkez.blogs.iva.co.uk/
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[Skippy]

No, don't stop posting!!! I was just being nosy as you give such good advice!

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is the present - a gift to make the most of.

View my blog at http://skippy13.blogs.iva.co.uk/

[Andy2]

Thanks Skippy [:D]

[tracy.h]

Andy regardless as to wheather or not u r in an iva,your posts are very helpful,and help other posters,so please do not stop posting,this forum needs people that can be helpful be it in an iva or like yourself prepared to take your own time out to try and give advise its very much appreciated,as i said earlier we all do it because we care,and you obviously have a good knowledge and are prepared to pass that on,look forward to reading your future posts.
Im glad you had a good weekend skippy i must admuit yours and kerri's and lilys posts have been so inspireing to me,i feel that i know each and every one of you,oh and i cant forget ang and dave thats what makes this forum for me so specail,no matter what is happening in our lifes we are all there to pass on our wisdom and support to others,and each other hopefully may this continue for a long time to come.xxxx

[thebear29uk]

Just to clarify one point.

Daz had experienced the phone calls/letters from creditors previously when he met his partner. I think thats why his sister stepped in to help.

My personal feeling is that Daz needed the hard facts somebody like Melanie could give but what he got was feedback from people in the same situation. Unfortunately we can only relate to our own circumstances or what we've learnt through this forum.

Some people post here to get the black and white facts. Others post for support from fellow debtors.

Daz if you are reading this please continue to post and keep us updated of your situation. To everybody else and Tracy in particular, this forum wouldn't amount to much if we all left it to somebody else to answer a post asking for help. Daz's last post was on a more positive note so, hopefully, once he has some professional advice, he will return to let us know how he is getting on.

Best wishes

Dave