Been told we are 'stupid'

[drowning-mummy]

Confessed to good friends (one of whom works in finance) and been told that we are fools to enter into an IVA with joints debts of £24,000.
No other explanation was given other than "talk to the creditors and come to an aggrement'. I'm not so sure............it may only be £24,000but we still cant afford it. Secondly, it may be all well and good coming to terms with a creditors offering, but what if they hit me with a charging order?
I'm so confused now. Been told that our whole life will be taken over and watched. And that we will lose any equity (we are in negativity now) because it is a fundamental clause.

[Viki.W]

Hey drowning-mummy, I don't think you're a fool at all! You can only do what you feel is right for the both of you. Take the time to consider ALL your options carefully. Have you had professional advice yet? Viki X

[OPTIMIST12]

Hi drowning-mummy -

The obvious thing here is - regardless of what good friends may have said - your proper and moral responsibility is to repay as much as possible of what you / partner knowingly borrowed from Creditors. We all borrowed the money - we should all repay the MAX possible. What excuse is there ?? - absolutely none!!!! We are SO fortunate to have so much money potentially written off - please dont side with those who try to hide behind their clear responsibilitirs.

Good Luck - Set your repayments to the Max - you must know its the right thing ro do.

What on earth did your friends suggest as the "right" course??? Very curious.

[wen]

Optimist, I think the "right" course the friends were suggesting is to negotiate/deal with the creditors directly.

May I respectfully add in my opinion, your "pro-Creditor/let's all bow at their feet and beg them to accept an IVA" comments are probably not what drowning-mummy is looking for here.

Drowning-mummy, if you cannot afford to make a sensible arrangement direct with your creditors, then an IVA is exactly the right choice for you.

For the period of the IVA things will not be easy and you will have your finances reviewed, but this I assume you knew already?

[Reviva UK]

Different debt levels mean different things to different people.

24,000 of debt - whilst not huge - might as well be £1m if you can't afford it.

You could do no better than to get Free Impartial Advice about all the options re your position and this advice will cover the negative equity now, the potential of a year 4 equity clause in an IVA and the pitfalls of Br.

You are not new to the forum so I don't really need to point the way but you could do no better than give Melanie's team a call tomorrow and go through all the options available.

In my humble experience the more people you share the problem with the more conflicting answers you get. Please rely on a professional who has a great reputation at getting it right.

The rest is down to you.

[OPTIMIST12]

Hi -

drowning-mummy - at the end of the day only you can make the best decision as to what suits your own circumstances.

I am in no position really to criticise anyone but I do just spout my own opinion that it is good to try and repay the most you can. I am 15 months in to my IVA and it is DESPERATELY hard sometimes. But I really hope I will see it through.

If you think like me then you will look to repay the max possible - if you dont think like me then you will maybe have another point of view!!!

Whatever you decide - I hope that you find a solution that suits you and your Creditors. Good Luck to You!!!!

[TheMatrix]

I don't know about your whole life, certainly you will have to go through 4 annual reviews and have to stick to a budget for 5 years but at the end of all that you can say you've paid back what you can and paid off all your debts.

I don't think your stupid, and well for friends to say that frankly I'm surprised.

At the end of the day, you do what is right for you, and don't listen to what everyone else thinks. You are your own person

[Kazzy E]

Hi Kaz, that is the very reason why we haven't told a soul about our prospective IVA (except the forum of course). I have told you in previous posts and emails that we haven't even told our best friends. No-one has any right to judge you about the decision you end up making. You will be doing whats right for you and your family, the same as we will. Yes, we realise that we will probably be under the spotlight for 5 yrs, but no more than the spotlight we would be under by our creditors when we can't meet our monthly payments and end up being taken to court. So, with all your 'friends' on the forum, I would keep sharing the problem to this space as everyone on here is in the same boat and KNOWS what you are going through. You have taught me a really good lesson today, I am keeping SCHTUM! Email me if you need a chat. Regards Kazzy x [:)]

[Lisa2009]

Dont worry what anybody thinks. If the IVA is right for YOU, then it is RIGHT.
To come to an arrangement with creditors, you run the risk of having huge interest charges added on whereas with an IVA interest stop

For us some months were very hard and we argued a lot but we still stuck together.
We are all done now and looking back, im glad hubby chose the step he did. It was the safer option.
Yes we lost a bit of the equity but hey, we still have a chunk of it and we are debt free with a mortgage thats still affordable.

Dont worry xxxx

[cfnc]

I would let them have their opinion drowning mummy and tell them you are allowed your!

Some people who are not in debt or have higher salaries do not realise the stress that you are under.

You have thought long and hard over this and come to the right decision for you and you are with a great IP, Melanie isnt it?

Try not to let negative comments worry you, and with regard to the equity clause, the most you would ever have to release is the remaining debt owed, plus intest and IP fees, if that is of course if you have the equity. If you did decide to do as your 'friends' say, the charges that the creditors could levy and interest would probably equate to more.

Also in the plus side once your IVA is agreed you no longer have to worry about phonecalls and letters and home visits. Just make sure you have enough money in your Iand E for your day to day living.

All the best

Kirsty

[aguise]

I agree with Paul, if you are unsure then get more advice from someone else. At the end of the day the choice and decision is yours. My opinion of the iva is always quite clear, it is the best thing we have ever done. I dont feel watched by big brother in the slightest. I conform in every way and in fact remind them if they are late. (just reminded them of my six month review)Enquire with Melanie or Paul if you feel unsure.

Ang x

[drowning-mummy]

Thank you everyone. All I did last night was think about it and them. At the end of the day, the only time I feel 'safe' and see a glimmer of hope is when I have communication with Melanies team, so I know in my heart that is the right path. They also said that it would affect the rest of my life and I would always pay over the odds for a mortgage etc. Just really scared me. I actually want to be 'watched' over the next five years. That is my chance to change and adapt for the best, but they made it sound like if I spent £10 less on shopping one week, I would have to send a cheque of asap. I want to pay my creditors back as much as possible (afterall I spent it) and I think the only safe and secure way to do this is to have an IVA 'protect' us f that makes sense?
Sorry for waffle last night, but it really did scare me and yes John is right, it may 'only' be £24,000 to them but we cant pay it and thats that!

[cfnc]

Good to see you are a little more positive today, try not to let other people who do not know what they are talking about upset you.

Kirsty

[kallis3]

Glad to see you are more positive (1st time I have read these posts!) I also have not told anyone other than step children (who are also in deep doo doo with money). May I suggest that your friends, even though they work in finance, do not know how an IVA works?

As everyone has said - you do what is right for you. I believe you will be better off in an IVA. It is far easier for someone who knows what they are doing to negotiate with your creditors than it is for you to do so. Plus if you do it, it will be DMP and take forever to clear.

Do whatever gives you peace of mind.

[freelili]

Dm

I would choose to use the professional way over trying to sort it yourself. Its legal protection from creditors is worth every penny.

OK, so we borrowed the money,,, It was a buisness deal which the creditor hoped to make from, not a gift from a friend, they took a chance on you and lost...Dont beat yourself up too much about that, you want to pay something back but its not pay everything back at all costs. You do have to live, 'setting the pay back as high as you can' in the long run wont work. Far better to have a resaonable income and expenditure that is more likey to last the course.

I hope youre feeling better, its so easy when youre feeling a bit glum, scared and down to take some comments to heart. Hold your head up and dont let anyone get to you. As you say, you can only do your best.

Good luck.