Can anyone give me some kind words

[baldy]

Hi katie,yes a big welcome to the forum. This is a place where you will get lots of support,and friendly help no matter what time of the day it is!!
There is always somebody on here who will have the answer, or has been through what your feeling etc.

Yeah it does feel strange taking the IVA path, but for us we felt it was the only way to stop the runnaway train of debt.

Nobody in our family knows what we are going through, or have been through. Unless you do want to tell a close friend or family member i dont think anybody will find out, but you might find it a bit eaiser if you did,only you can answer that one. Sometimes i want to tell a close mate at work but at first i felt it was a weakness on my part getting into this mess in the first place, but now i really do feel quite pleased with myself that ive stood up and had a major lightbulb moment and have stopped the rot and doing something about it. For me there is a lot to be said for that i feel.
Sadly there is probley a lot of people out there struggling and i hope they also find the courage to seek help.
Im sure once things settle down and you start making your monthly payments things will look a great deal better. All the best. Baldy and Family.

[Rosepetal]

HI, my parents know(they put the £ forward for our F&F IVA). we told a couple who are our friends but no one else knows.

family suspect something's going on but i haven't told them anything,my sister keeps fishing.

we can't wait to get off the insolvency register,i don't want anyone to know. there's a lot of shame attached to debt. my husbands old boss approached him for info. on a IVA(he told her what was going on so he could get the day off for our creditors meeting),she's married with a child,her husband doesn't know she's got thousands of £'s on cc's. she got cold feet &said she'd try to carry on but she's struggling to meet min. payments.

things aren't easy but it's so much better than where we were.

[Hippo]

Hi Kate
A big hug for you dont tell your husband ok about that

Firstly quit the tears and smile Your IVA will be accepted as you are a teacher you should be in a pretty secure job and with a decent salary £18500 is not that great an amount when you read other
peoples amounts So dont worry about that either My family has a few teachers in there so I knonw you should be on a nice salary for paying your IVA back so you are already a lot better than a lot of people
Nobody would know that you are doing an IVA unless they searched around for that information and would need your address to be sure it was you So dont worry about that either See knocking these worries off no problems

When you start the IVA you will feel a whole lot better guaranteed ok just think of it as a Bank Loan for the next 5 years Pretty much everybody has some kind of loan these days or say they dont when they do
so if you ever get asked why you are not going away in the 6 weeks holidays or whenever just say you are saving up and trying to put money away for a holiday home in a few years Or say you want to get staright with paying some holiday trip you went on the last year or new car whatever
You have your hubby and can get through this no problem ONce you get the goahead you will soon get used to it and then get to the first year and the next then half way and then onto the end 5 years is not that long it soon passes Try not to think of it too much and wish the time away You are paying back as best you can its easy to walk away but you will soon get toughened up and you just need to accept your mistakes or whatever and then move on Its not the end of the world its only money
In a couple of years you maybe in a postion to clear the amount and be done with it early Theres always positives in everything and I found this forum only recently so I have learnt a lot and ask a lot of dumb questions coz I just took the IVA on alone nobody knows just a couple of close friends Its not that big a deal I think people are too focussed on the negatives in the IVA rather than the positives You should get support from your company if you have issues you are allowed to miss 2 payments and you can always ask for a payment break it just gets added on at the end
So yes a bit worrying at the start sure but you are on the road now as the saying goes the longest journy starts with the first step this is just a 5 year road or less
chin up and stay strong take care and smile

[MRBLUESKY]

I was on the insolvency register for nearly 4 years and nobody mentioned it to me.Good Luck Katie, dont worry ,in the big World your debt is on the small side.I,m sure you will be fine and have faced your debt problems at a stage much earlier than most people, including myself.

[kallis3]

There is nobody that I know who knows of my situation and knows of the Insolvency Register and long may that last.

[orange]

most people dont know of an iva or the register! take advice about if your doing the correct thing ,its a long long road and it twist and turns .good luck

[dontlookback]

Hi and welcome
An IVA is an excellent way to deal with debt in the right circumstances and is very private.Your employer will not be informed and life will carry on as normal as far as friends and neighbours are concerned.
Once you are in the payday loan cycle it is almost impossible to get out of them.You are not alone and everyone posting on this forum has first hand experience of debt, many will feel the same as you and will be at the same stage.
Once your IVA is in place creditors will not contact you and you will be able to get on with your work and life and look forward to becoming debt free.
We are all here to help and support you
Regards

hi you have taken the right step ,no one will no only if you tell them hold your head up high and belive in your self, 5 years seems like forever but its not ,think month to month not years and be thank full we have a way out in such a short time without it being listed in the press for all and saundry to see good luck

[Dumbeh]

Hi Katie

I appreciate that as a teacher you don't want your debt problem being made public but trust me, no matter what your occupation, this is the same for most of us. My husband and I are in an interlocking IVA for considerably more than your debt. However, we have not told anyone about it and don't consider it anyone else's business.

I just wanted to say you are doing the right thing and I can't begin to describe the relief you will feel when your creditors meeting is done and your IVA proposal accepted.

Well done for taking the first steps and posting on this forum. I for one have posted a few times on here when things are worrying and the help and support on here is priceless! (No pun intended.)

[Rosepetal]

Hi, being in debt is horrible. a IVA isn't easy,nor is BR. for us it was one or the other,we had no choice. it's doing the best thing in a difficult situation. we were drowning in debt,the IVA was a lifeline.things aren't easy,but,it's better than it was,it's going to take time but we will get there,so will you Katie,hope things are ok x

[Jackieg]

Hi Katie and welcome, nothing to add really beyond what everyone else has said but you've taken the hardest step and that's admitting to yourself you can't carry on the way things are and have started the IVA process. See it as a light at the end of the tunnel and as others have said here, I'm sure there's a vast number of us in exactly the same situation with debt - when you hear about countries defaulting on debt it somehow puts everything into perspective.

Don't be too hard on yourself either, illness led me into debt and with hindsight I wish I'd done something about it sooner but life just isn't like that. As for telling anyone, its no-one else's business but your own. I've only told my close friends and family, plus occupational health at work (I have a long-term illness).

Good luck with it all and don't forget, your not alone when you belong to this brilliant and supportive forum!! )

[Foggy]

Hello and welcome. There is no shame in our situation (after all Greece, Portugal, Italy, Spain UK and USA aren't doing much better!). As said above, it's nobody's business but your own ( which is where this forum is a great help and it gives you somewhere to talk about this stuff). I have told no-one at all ( well --- except for my IP company and a few hundred on here !).

Chin up - one step at a time.

[country girl]

Hi Katie

Welcome to this forum, we have all been in the same place but it will get better once your IVA is up and running.It is hard sometimes but much better than the alternative.

All our unsecured debt was in my name as I managed all the finances and my husband did not know how bad things were. Having to tell him the mess I had made of everything was the worse part. Only our two daughters know about my debts and thats the way I want it to stay!
Good luck.
Linda

[Rosepetal]

country girl,hi,my hubby held most of our debt,he'd got card's etc i didn't know about. once i knew we went on to how we could sort it out,together. it isn't easy but my hubby feels so much better,i'm sure you do.

[country girl]

Hi Rosepetal

Yes i do feel better as this went on for years, I did not want to worry him with it but of course in the end I had to. He was really upset and angry at the time but it is better now. He does wish I had told him much sooner. I would recommend to somebody not to keep things like this from their other half.
Linda X

[kallis3]

Can totally agree with that Linda - I was just the same.

We have no secrets now.