do you think an IVA is the best route for us

[tracy.h]

Please dont apoligise,i understand your emotion,but if you dont try you dont know,try and look at the positive aspects,if you do manage to sell your home then you wont have this imense pressure,obviously your husband has been through a hell of a lot.
I feel you need a fresh start,for all of you.You can run your biussness from a rented accommodation,and build from there,and believe me by admitting now that you cant carry on it really is the first step to making a better life for your family.Stay strong im sure you will find an answer to your problems,and at the end of the day you have each other.Please concentrate on that.remember we are here for you.Goodluck please let us no how you are doing x

[loulou5]

Hi Melanie,

I think i will go to my local citizens advice Bureau.

The only space i have is for 3 days a week for 1 more child (due to ofsted limits on how many children you can look after),and am currently advertising this space.

Could our worst case sceneario be bankruptcy?

[loulou5]

Thankyou for your kind words Tracy.

[MelanieGiles]

Bankruptcy could be a blessing in disguise as it will take away the pressure from the debts, and you will have one year to find alternative accomodation before a Trustee can sell your property. The downside is that it leaves you with no money to put down as a rental deposit - do you have any family members who could help with that?

Regards, Melanie Giles, Insolvency Practitioner for over 20 years.

For further details contact me at http://www.melaniegiles.com and view my IVA blog at: http://melaniegiles.blogs.iva.co.uk

[loulou5]

Possibly my mother and her partner....but it's the asking and admitting to failure. It's not so bad for me but it could possibly tip my husband over the edge.
The things that are going through my mind right now are WHY, HOW, WHEN did we get so deeply into this.
Okay ....so if we did end up bankrupt, would anyone want to rent a house too us?
Would we be able to have a bank account?
How long does Bankruptcy last?
So many questions
Also...now i know that an IVA isn't suitable for us, should i still be posting on here...do i need to find another site?

[Adam Davies]

Louise.s
Have a look at Skippy,s blog on this site,this is a forum member that has recently gone bankrupt and its not as bad as you would imagine.It really could be an answer to your problems.
Have a read then have an informal discussion about your situation with one of the companies that post on this site.
regards

Andy Davie
IVA.co.uk Spokesperson and site manager
(aka Neverending)

Please check out my blog: http://andydavie.blogs.iva.co.uk

View my profile here:
http://www.iva.co.uk/andy_davie_profile.asp

[loulou5]

Hi Andy,
Thankyou, i have just read Skippy's blog.
I suppose the only thing i'm thinking at the moment is everything we're going to lose...it's all so negative at the moment for me. We'll lose our beautiful home, have our name in the paper, everyones going to know what's going on. Our three kid's are going suffer because of our mistakes....this hurts the most for me as they've been through so much already.
I'm sorry to be so negative when all of you kind people are trying to give positive advice.

[MelanieGiles]

Loulou

There are many people here on the forum who are going through similar difficulties to you - some have sold their properties and others are in the process of doing so. Most of them have found it quite easy to find rented accomodation - and bankruptcy proceedings will last for just one year.

Regards, Melanie Giles, Insolvency Practitioner for over 20 years.

For further details contact me at http://www.melaniegiles.com and view my IVA blog at: http://melaniegiles.blogs.iva.co.uk

[Skippy]

Loulou, please don't be afraid of becoming bankrupt. Rather than viewing it as failure, think of it as a fresh start, and it sounds as though you and your husband need that. At court you will be treated with compassion and dignity - at no time did I feel that anyone was judging me. Even my interview with the Official Receiver, although nervewracking, was nowhere near as bad as I thought it would be. I now feel as though my life is back on track and I can move on.

Regarding having your name in the paper, I really don't feel that people look at the announcements these days, and even if they do I'm sure no-one will take a great deal of notice.

If you wanted to contact me off the forum I have no objections to Admin passing on my email address to you.

Onwards and upwards!!!

View my blog at http://skippy13.blogs.iva.co.uk/

[freelili]

Loulou

I have just read your posts and want to say, I really do know how difficult this is and how impossible it seems right now. I have a friends who due to IVF treatments over committed themselves, they both knew that deep down for a long time and she spend thousands and I mean thousands of pounds on baby stuff, without ever getting pregnant. She had a beautiful home but it was just not enough. She buried her head and sometimes I felt like screaming at her, eventually they realised and were devastated to lose the home they had. It happened and it was tough for them but not as tough as they thought, they both went BR, left their home to the crocadile creditors that made their lives a misery and rented a house. They thought their lives were over, they had in their minds lost everything and felt ashamed. It was just the begining though, they fell pregnant natrually and have two children they adore, they are happier than I have ever seen them and live in council accomodation. I know its easy for me to say it will get better. Your children will be picking up on all thats going on around them now, and I promise you will have good times again. Take a big deep breath, and face this one day at a time. Take small, postive steps forward without looking negatively back. We are here anytime to support you through this.

Good luck

LILY

I asked God for a solution and have to live with his reply.