Thankyou Tina. This forum has been very helpful and I now have some news after speaking to Grant Thornton just now.
It would seem I don't need to have a telephone meeting tomorrow so this has been cancelled as the young lady I originally spoke to had got all confused and didn't understand what I was saying to her.
As I am just paying the arrears that I had built up over the 8 months of unemployment with one outstanding payment to end my IVA in December as it was originally ending, Dad just needs to call in now with my ref and just pay the arrears and thats it once I've made the FINAL monthly payment for next month!
I WILL BE A FREE MAN!
I can't believe it and I am happy I would have paid off the family debts and its making me feel good and now both my wife and I can pick up and try and get life back on track with no debts to worry about!
I only have good things to say about Grant Thornton as they have been helpful from the beginning and understood when I lost my job last year, with no badgering for money as I kept them informed all the way and started payments up as soon as I got back into work.
I would recommend an IVA and yes, its hard at first to make a decision like entering into one but overall, I've managed to pay off most of the debts my ex wife left me with and now she can go and jump of a very high cliff!
I have one piece of valuable advice for anyone else faced with the same dilemma of divorce and debts as I was faced with, talk to a reputable debt advisor ,CAB is a start as I did, and don't let divorce beat you as there are ways like a DMA or IVA that can help get your life back on track. I can only say that until you've taken the first step and accepted it needs sorting, you won't know whats possible.
Remember, what goes around, comes back around, look at me, I'm now in a better position than I ever was when I got lumbered with the families debts and nothing to show for the years and years I spent working hard and paying off for stuff I hadn't realised my ex was leeching of. Be brave and take the step! There is life after debt. I'm proof of it. Good luck all

IVA completed!!! Looking forward to getting my life back! Stay positive and you'll get there in the end.