Good Morning Everyone

[princessb]

I just wanted to introduce myself to everyone really and thought this was the best place! I'm Stephanie, 23 years old from Rotherham, South Yorkshire. I'm married and my husband and I are approx £41,000 in debt. We are in the initial stages of setting up an IVA so any help and advice anyone could give is much appreciated. I'm lucky in the fact that my husband and I never argue about money! We're just trying to find the best solution to help us.

[Skippy]

Hi Stephanie and welcome! Good luck with setting up your IVA - I'm glad that you and your husband are managing to sort this out without arguing. I've been lucky that my partner has been really supportive, and we have also managed to get through this without arguing!

I know you'll have read this 1000 times on the forum, but make sure your living expenses are realistic before you agree to your income and expenditure. Mine weren't, and I'm now considering bankruptcy, although I am going to have a go at getting a variation.

Yes Kerri, I can walk today (surprisingly!), although my legs are hurting! I took my mum's mad dog out for a walk this morning as well - I don't know where this new found energy has come from! I think I might be getting some divine inspiration from my uncle!

Onwards and upwards!!!

[freelili]

Hi princes, welcome, and good luck cant say much I will lose my connection. Post any questions you have on the date, experts dont use this bit.

Trace, just read your post to melanie, I am thinking that you are getting a bit mixed up with grief and debt and boy do I know how you feel. You seem to be going from super strong skippy to dumping it all and again, I know the feeling. My advise is, put it on hold, get yourself sorted with a break, forget the crocodile creditors for a bit, (whats the worst that can happen?) concentrate on you dave and only you and dave. I am angry with the whole world and am going to do just that, I have posted on this site under update. Everyone around me is trying to help but I have been shutting them out, you know what I mean? You are grieving also, and I suspect going through the same thing, (life is too short right, it aint fair, piss off I am doing my best, what do you know) sound familiar? Let the creditors get french connections UK for a while, concentrate on you. Will see you later must go internet connection dodgey.

I am on your side, right there with ya babe. be back when my own brain is de-scrambled.

love you all kez, coco, dd.


LILY

[scaredkez]

lily take care and have a good rest at your brothers, will be in touch via e-mail and Im still,go and sort your head out and refresh your brain you really deserve it, i am glad you are having a break from the kids to and that they will be spending some time with their dad, i know you will miss them dreadfully but you will have some lily time to get your head around everything.

skippy glad your legs are workable today, my computer went off on me and my dvd drive wouldn't work so have spent the day taking it apart and fixing it, it is back up and running obviously wouldn't know what to do if i didn't have my comp.
take care everyone especially lily will be thinking of you
kerri

[freelili]

Hi kerri

Spending this week with the kids, am not going to think about debts or money. We have to finish moms this week should be going on sale on Friday. Plus Matt is home this week. Dads having them next week and I am going to London for a few days. My hubby phoned last night, he is worried that I just have too much on. I am going to accept all help and think about debts after. I have just been shut away and have been feeling angry, I think its just part of grief. Toria is coming with me, she has missed me and I've not been fair to her, she is broken hearted about mom also. Anyway we off to heal our heads and hearts, quality time together, without looking after the boys. Will be thinking of you all, Kez I know its hard for you also, take care of yourself, always thinking of you.

love

LILY

[scaredkez]

lily thats great toria is going with you, can have some mum and daughter quality time, the break is just what you need and i don't blame you for accepting some help off the hubby, i hope you have a fantastic time in london and get out and do some site seeing, really enjoy yourselves and think of nothing but yourselves.
i am having a bad time with my computer it must be in sympathy with yours, its very slow difficult connecting ok when it has eventually, but its just not right done every virus and spy check under the sun maybe it needs a break.
take care and enjoy yourselves kerri

[freelili]

Yes I am having same trouble, I wrote a really long post to zee zee who is going BR, then lost it, so annoying, I could have thrown it through the window, have to type quick and have not time to check spelling etc. It sucks... I will thanks, Toria has been helping with the boys far too much, Christopher has had fits (loads) and she has tried to cope with him at night, to help me. She has been crying alone in her room and playing playing CD.s Hurt by christina agalara (however you spell it) and Are you happy by snow patrol (I think). Over and Over again. I have to give her some quality time. I took her to the hairdressers yesterday and today we have watched Toy Story and Titanic. We will get there.

LILY

[jannette92]

So sorry to hear you are all feeling so low. I hate money and have for the last 25 years. To wake up every morning and see the £ signs in front of your face and then to go to bed at night with those same £ signs again is not a way to live your life.
Life is too short and love and family is the main thing in life but when all you see is £ signs you tend to lose the personality side of you which is so sad, you are shut within yourslef engulfed in worry.
We are awaiting a creditors meeting on 19th Feb and hoping and praying it will go through, so at the moment I am sleeping better cos I live in hope. But hearing all the trauma and problems you have all gone through perhaps I am being a little optimistic.
Anyway now we have addressed our debt problem I think there is no turning back and if an IVA is not successful I don't even think we will go for a DMP just go straight for bankruptcy. As the debts are only in my husbands name presumably only he would have to file for bankruptcy.
I send you all my love and wish you well you seem to have been having it really rough and you sound like lovely people who don't deserve to suffer like this.
Take care and keep your chins up.

Jan x

[Skippy]

Jan, please carry on being optimistic! IVA's can work, just make sure you are honest with your income and expenditure, and don't agree to anything just to get your IVA approved.

Good luck for 19th Feb x

Onwards and upwards!!!

[freelili]

Skippy
I jusr wanted to say, I did say it earlier here, that due to the sad death of your uncle, you may be on brain overload also and putting it on your IVA. Its really difficult to put into words, its like, yearning, guilt, anger, self blame, etc. It feels like you just want to say, piss off I am doing my best, life is just too short, its not fair, what the hell do you know? And, It seems you are putting it on your IVA, I know its tough, and you didnt allow enough for your living expenses, but I would'nt make any decision for a while yet, also dont blame yourself, you were trying to address a desperate problem. I may be totally wrong, if I am I am sorry, but it seems to me you are going from super strong skippy to dumping it all and going BR, I know this feeling so well. I find that I get up fairly positive with an agenda, then one little thing sends me running to my safe room and shutting the door. I feel that you need a break or if not some skippy time, where you dont think about anything other that yourself and Dave. Dont worry about the crocodile creditors for a while, whats the worst that can happen?
I am taking a break now so I will leave my love with you and I will be thinking of you tomorrow. I am really sorry if I have got this wrong, but I just needed to say it before I go.

Janette, dont worry, you have done all you can now and more importantly you are already on the road to freedom just by recognising and trying to do something about the debt, I wish you the best of luck.

remember, a person that cant make a mistake cant do anything

Good luck people, will be thinking of you

LILY

[Skippy]

Lily, you have summed it up perfectly! I am definitely not going to do anything yet - what's another month? I have spoken to Myvesta this morning - I wish I had known about them at the start. BR is on the back burner for a while as Myvesta have advised that the OR could say I have beneficial interest in the flat - no way can I ask Dave to remortgage! I'm going to get tomorrow over and done with before I do anything else.

Enjoy your break Lily, and thanks for your help and understanding x

Onwards and upwards!!!

[freelili]

Oh Skippy, I know how you feel. Will be thinking of you tomorrow. Not having much of a rest so far, we are changing the living room back to its pre-christmas state, have pinched a bookcase out of toria's room to display moms stuff, loads of mom boxes to sort, but we have a smile on our faces, not thinking about anything else. Kids are running up and down stairs with books etc. They will slepp tonight. I feel so lifted just not thinking about money/debts. Over and out for a while.

Lily

LILY

[coco]

fed up and depressed today no energy even find it hard to keep a conversation going tonight with the family so been on the net looking at everything that i can possibly do to get out of this situation.

51 payments to go
(I apologise for my keyboards poor spelling and grammar)
http://coco.blogs.iva.co.uk

[freelili]

coco

I am sorry for you situation, I feel for you in your serch for answers. Is BR not an option for you? or is it just too scary. You can be in a room full of people ans still feel alone, I know. Shame the chat room is not up and running. I am sending you a virtual hug.

LILY

[Skippy]

Sorry to hear you're feeling so low Coco. I can understand a bit of how you are feeling.

Don't forget we are all here for you on the forum xxx

Onwards and upwards!!!
View my blog at: http://skippy13.blogs.iva.co.uk/