Had a bad few days

[Soulgrowth]

Just wanted to share my worries with you folks, as you are some of the only 'friends' I have. I heard yesterday that a very good friend of mine has been remanded in custody in the awful Wandsworth Prison (I've done a few Open University tutorial visits there so I've an idea what it's like) ... we are all convinced that he was set up for the crime he is alleged to have committed.

He simply went to check in at the local Police station on Tuesday as a routine visit to see what progress was being made and he was arrested there and then and is now awaiting trial.[:(]

I am very worried about him, he hasn't been in touch with me directly but the prison chaplain contacted the funeral directors he works for to say that he wouldn't be in for work for a little while ... which sounds like a bit of an understatement. I was able to write to him today having found out his prison number quite unofficially as I know the Education Manager at Wandsworth. He has a little dog at home which is his life and I don't know what's happened to Bubs (the dog) ... or what is going on in general.

Sorry to offload on a completely unrelated IVA matter folks ... but the whole thing has completely upset me and thrwon me off track. I feel so helpless [:(]

Debbie

[Viki.W]

Oh Debbie, that's awful. Do you know what's happening with the case, will he get bail? Surely someone must know about the dog, they can't just do nothing. I'm so sorry, you seem to have been so happy the last few weeks too.

I think he is lucky to have a friend like you to worry about him. Maybe some of the legal eagles on here might be able to offer some advice.

I hope he is ok, and you too.

Thinking of you. Viki X

[Soulgrowth]

Thanks Viki. That's the difficult thing, I haven't got a clue what's happening and information is sketchy. I have written to my friend but it will take time for the letter to filter through.

He doesn't have any family as far as I'm aware ... indeed, I'm probably the closest he has to family ... and he's no spring chicken either.

There seems to be a protocol of you can't contact people in prison unless they choose to contact you and I expect he doesn't want to burden me.

I'm wondering whether it might be a good idea to pop into the RSPCA tomorrow, they may be able to force entry to see whether Bub's is there or not.

Debbie

[debtfreesusie67]

Sorry to hear this Debbie. Can't offer much help just to say we're all here for you. Hope you find out something soon. Please keep us posted.
Hugs

[Soulgrowth]

Thanks Sue

Debbie

[Viki.W]

I think that would be a good idea, It's lovely of you to take control. That poor dog, I hope he is ok. I think the RSPCA will definately get on the case.

How awful is that system.

If it helps, one of my best friends is a prison warden, I can speak to her tomorrow and find out what goes on when someone is remanded in custody in prison. She may be able to offer some advice.

Viki X

[Moneystinks]

Usually what happens to pets is that pets medics or the local dogs home will be contacted by the police and they will come out and collect the animal.

They will have done or usually do a house search so the dog should have been found and should be being looked after.

Usually the person arrested if the case is ongoing will be asked to attend the station the be arrested and then it is taken from there. You would be surprised at how many people actually attend their appointment to be arrested!

I hope things get sorted soon and that you get more info. Try and get your friend to contact his solicitor and give them authority for them to speak to you if only to put your mind at rest.

Hope you start to feel better. X

[Viki.W]

Good advice from Marie there, I hope that's what they have done and little Bubs ok. Viki X

[freelili]

Hi Debbie

Just wanted to say I am really sorry for whats happened. I cant offer anything as I have no experience of anything like this. I can so understand how helpless you must be feeling with this though, if you cant contact the person to know if he is alright. I am sure that the little dog will have been taken care of and I really hope you get some news on your good friend soon.

Thinking of you.

[pixie]

Aw Debbie, that's terrible. I can't really offer any advice but try not to worry. Your friend is probably still shell shocked at the whole thing and needs time to adjust before reaching out. Could you get a message to him through the prison chaplain?
I would think the police have taken care of bubs, but a visit to the house couldn't hurt. There's probably a nosy neighbour happy to fill you in!
Take Care,

[Soulgrowth]

Ahh ... thanks everyone. This Forum always comes up trumps! I feel so much better having slept on things and reading your kind and informative posts this morning. It's incredible to discover that people actually attend appointments to be arrested! Gosh, you live and learn every day don't you! Reading between the lines I think my friend suspected this might be the case when he last sent me a text earlier in the week, so I am sure that I am worrying unecessarily about Bubs ... but will however make some enquiries later today.

Hopefully, my friend will receive the letter I sent him on Monday and I have written again today in an attempt to keep his spirits up.I have put in it that he must put me down as 'next of kin' if he wishes. I also rang and spoke to the Prison Chaplain yesterday, in my capacity of fellow minister, and although she said they could not tell my friend I had rung, as it would appear that they have given me confidential information that he is with them ... with any luck some message will get through that I have been in touch.

So thanks everyone, and Pixie your words hit a particular note with me about my friend feeling able to 'reach out' ... hopefully my writing to him will make him see that I am indeed a trustworthy and loyal friend ... and he will be in touch when HE needs to as from researching on the web it would seem that people on remand have considerably more rights to contact the outside world than convicted people do ... so, for the present, I have to acknowledge that perhaps my concerns are more my issues rather than his.

I will be sure to keep you all posted ... and thank you all once again.

Debbie

[angela18]

oh Debbie thats awful.. hope your friend gets his letter so he knows that you are thinking of him.. he might send you a visiting order to go and see him. I would check about the dog though as he may be quite distressed. Poor little thing

[Shining]

Oh dear Debbie, I am so sorry to read this and hope you find some inner peace soon. x

[chardonnay]

Hi Debbie,
I'm really sorry to hear about the stress you are under. All I can offer is comfort and support as I have noe experience in this kind of matter. I'm trying the positive thinking thing a friend has done a course in - I'm sending all my positivity to you and hoping your friend and Bubs are OK.
Love & hugs,
Chardonnay

[kallis3]

Debbie, that's terrible. I do hope you manage to contact your friend so that he knows you are aware of his situation, and I hope you get the dog sorted too.