Hi, im not sure if this is even a valid post or not. After coming on the forum a few weeks back and getting great advice I am going the IVA route and feeling quite upbeat re the process and feeling there may be an end in sight.
However, my contact at my ip I am finding to be quite rude and abrupt. Every time I come off the phone I feel like I have been told off and totally ashamed of being in my situation. I am normally such a confident bubbly person-I work on a city trading floor and am well used to rudeness and abruptness....
I dont know if maybe I am being too sensitive because of the situation- but today he said he was drafting the proposal and was sending me a copy but he advised I had to give him very specific details of where my debt had gone,that I couldnt lie about it as they would know where it had gone-and if I had gambling or a drug problem I had to admit it. My only vice is chocolate and I do the grand national sweep at work! Fact is the debt has simply accumulated over many yrs and I have had significant costs relating to my dads illness but he said it wasnt specific enough.
I dont know if anyone has been in a similar situation or not- I understand the situation is completely my fault and im not after sympathy but I dont need to feel any worse than I do about it. He even sighed at me at one point.....
Oh no stressed1, it should not be like that at all[:(!]
Remember that you do have to deal with this company for potentialy 5 years if you use them, can you work with them for that long??
I would seriously consider seeking a second opinion if I was you. I got right to recieving my proposal from the first company I took advice from but was not happy and although it was awful to feel like you were starting all over again with another IP, I am so glad I made the decision to follow my instincts and get a second opinion.
have a good hard think about it x
Be positive & look after yourself, there are more important things in life than debts....
I agree with Emma, have a think about getting a second opinion. If your contact is making you feel like this at such an early stage will you really be able to deal with them for 5 years?
Things like this make me mad - manners cost nothing. If I spoke to my customers like that I'd be out of a job [:(!]
Wow, I reckon your IP must be having a bad day. Please try not to be too upset by his reaction, and you have done right to post. Everyone on here ( and there are a few of us now!!) knows how you feel, but there are very valid reasons why most of us got into debt. And whilst we would admit that we are mostly at fault, we call the IP as almost a cry for help, and the last thing you needed when you called, was for him to pile even more guilt on you. It helped us to actually write down the exact reasons for the debts starting and then buiding to what became an unsustainable level, having to go back 10 - 12 years to the start.
I hope this helps and remembere that however low you feel, there will always be a friendly welcome and reply on here.
Take care
Roadrunners
I agree, defo look around for second opinion.
I think I was very lucky as I choose my I.P. straight away not knowing that this forum was here but as I say, I was lucky as I'm happy with my I.P.
I remember my I.P. saying to me when I first phoned sounding very worried and stressed 'Don't worry, your debts are now our problem now'
Ah thanks for the support....I did notice the other day that at the bottom of his email it said 'insolvency administrator' and not ip. He has also said he has had to run things by his manager....
His manager signed the letter of engagement sent to me so I have no issues with going to see her in person....thing is he is doing his job and its all going thru well and I am happy with the proposal. Last thing I wanna do is have anything put back....im tempted to let it all go through and then specify to her that I would want to deal with her at review times
echo that michael I am so glad it's going to be over very soon, having said that I seem to have become really interested in it and may stay up while I am still off work with my broken coccyx[:)]
Be positive & look after yourself, there are more important things in life than debts....
Why should an IP need to know exactly what you spent the money on? My IP didnt need to know and to be honest why should they? Obviously drugs and gambling could create a problem but your reasons as you havve stated should be enough for your IP to get on with what there paid to do.
There is nothing to beat dealing with your IP directly, and I would certainly recommend having a chat with the IP at the firm you have chosen to represent you to explain your concerns.
An experienced insolvency administrator ought to be able to word a few sentences around the background of your financial difficulties - and it seems to me that you have given sufficient information. At the end of the day creditors do not want to read "War and Peace"!
Perfectly understandable to not want to start things over - but do remember that you have to enjoy a good working relationship with these guys for the next five years, and not the five weeks it takes to put a proposal together.
No, I totally understand and I will be booking that appointment. Other than the page explanation I have already given I have nothing else to put!!!! He also reeled off a list of material posessions I may have and asked if I had a 6k diamond ring knocking around anywhere??? God if only....!
