Hello

[spearmint]

Hi, I wish I had found this site a couple of years ago, still better late than never!
We are 27 months into our IVA and it's been a struggle, but it is getting better. We still have bad months, unexpected things to pay for etc. But with a little sideways thinking we have managed to cope so far.
We grow our own veg, make jam and I cook the majority of things from scratch, not because I'm a domestic goddess but because it's cheaper.
My hubby is feeling down at the moment, he is fed up with struggling, but it's not like we have a lot of options.
He can sleep round the clock and I am up till the early hours most days.
Stress effects everyone in different ways!

[MelanieGiles]

Good on you for surviving so far and being so enterprising to ensure that your payments are made. Keep up the hard work and each month is a month nearer the end.

[spearmint]

Thank you.
Got to pull the OH out of his depression, not like him to be on a downer, that's my job!

[kallis3]

Welcome to the forum and well done on getting this far with your IVA, I'm not too far behind you.

I think we all get depressed with the struggling, but it's better struggling like this than constantly worrying about hassle from the creditors.

My hubby is a whizz in the kitchen and he makes his own jam as well!

Keep posting, we're all here for each other for support and advice and we have a good social side as well.

[Shining]

A very warm welcome from myself too. I am feeling a little sorry for myself this morning as my daughters Prom is upon us and I can't get her what I want to, she is having to make do and she doesn't deserve to make do, she deserves the world. My fault and a huge price to pay for me getting myself into this situation. Hopefully at her wedding I'll be able to watch my Princess go down the aisle, rather than 'make do'.

Back to you, you sound like you're doing a really good job within your IVA, I'm on payment 29 this month and each one is closer to the end as Melanie says, almost half way for us both. The forum is a godsend to me at times and certainly without it, I do question if my IVA would have survived. x

[MelanieGiles]

Lesley

H will not be worried one bit about you not being able to buy her a posh frock. She has a loving Mummy which is all I am sure that matters to her right now rather than material issues - and like you say you will have a wedding to look forward to at some stage.

[Shining]

Thanks Melanie, just sat here feeling sorry for myself today, my cousin is in ITU and you know what it's like lots of things going on etc., x

[MrsKnight]

Hi & welcome from me too.

I agree with you on wishing Id found this site sooner.
And I totally agree with Lesley as I also question if we'd of got this far without the forum.
I think we all get run down with the IVA life & well done for getting to the point you are, keep up the good work.
Our Car is currently due to go for its MOT & Service & it fills me with dread as it went horrendously wrong with months of starting our IVA. My little ones make me feel terrible about our situation, as they often miss out on what others kids do n get. And myself n my hubby always put them first before us. N sometimes going without for long periods of time gets you down n depressed, my hubby is currently feeling down too.
But as the months go down the light gets a little bit brighter & there will be an end & slowly it is getting closer.

[Shining]

Excellent post Lyns and I know there are people out there a lot worse off than I am but just sometimes you feel so alone and want so much but it's so far out of your reach, but at the end of the day all I want is materialistic and life can carry on very well without it. My daughter isn't bothered (or so she says) and to me would look beautiful in a bin bag but it's a Mum thing I think. xx

[spearmint]

Just got in from work and reading the replies has cheered me up so much, thank you.
I was feeling like we were in this self-induced postition all alone, but not anymore!
I know what you mean about the kids suffering, we have 3 sons, 18,17 and 14, they have been great but, I still feel dreadful.
On the plus side they all have weekend jobs and seem to be much better at budgeting than we were at their age. Hopefully they have learnt a valuable financial lesson from our cock-up. I live in hope!

[MrsKnight]

Lesley - again I agree with you totally, it can get really frustrating n sometimes feels like every one around me are 10 steps ahead.
But they will still have the credit card bills n store card bills etc.
Im sure your daughter is going to look stunning in what ever she wears & Im very sure your daughter wont have to make do the day she gets married xxxx
As long we all plod on, keeping everything crossed, n the forum keeps on going - we WILL get to the end!

Spearmint - your very welcome & you are so not alone!
My little ones will be coming up 8 & 10 when we finish our IVA, so there will be lots of time to catch up on some of the things they are missing & get some saving done too. They are learning young though - they know when things r on offer or in the sale!! They understand when we say No or its to many pennies. We work hard for them to make xmas/birthdays special n what they want. Its the holidays that are hard n not being able to afford cinema/farms etc. Im dreading the 6 week break already! Though we do have the beach n parks n country all 10 mins away from were we live - lucky really.
Any how must stop waffling!

[MelanieGiles]

And don't forget e-bay ladies. I am sure my fellow IP Sue will not mind me mentioning the fact that she wore a fantastic frock at last week's IP annual dinner at our conference in Portugal which cost her a mee £10. Brand new Coast halter neck and she looked absolutely stunning.

[Shining]

Luckily my 2nd son's girlfriend has some 'nice' things, so shoes/jewellery will be borrowed, nails done free of charge by her too. Hair by the hairstylist who comes to my house so will be put up nicely and so basically it was only the dress and I think that was one of the cheapest ones in the shop bless her. Luckily she does know about our situation and appreciates it, I'm all too sure she'll learn by it so that's a positive. It was just me yesterday feeling sorry for myself. Sorry ladies and thanks for your support. x

[kallis3]

Ebay is brilliant for really posh outfits. I got one a few years ago for a wedding I went to and I think that only cost me about £15 and it looked really nice.

It's one of the first places I look these days.

[Shining]

I must admit to buying her a new dress but do you know the embarrassing thing, she who only earns a Saturday girls wage has paid for half of it as I couldn't manage it and hasn't batted an eye lid. She is one super kid