I am looking at taking out an IVA but I am so scared and at times suicidal about my position.

[Denise.gn]

I am looking at taking out an iva but I am so scared. My monthly payment may be 555 which I can afford and will leave me with approx 600 to live on each month which is far more than I currently live on. Does this sound right? I am so scared of losing my home if it fails or is rejected. I feel very depressed and at times suicidal about my positon. I owe nearly 38000 in credit cards.bankruptcy is not an option as my elderly mother lives with me and I can't bear for her to know about this or lose her home

[Til]

Hi Denise and welcome to the Forum.

I'm sure others will be along to give you more detailed advice soon but I saw your post title and just wanted to send you a virtual hug and say please don't allow your debts to make you feel as if there is no hope.

Don't worry you've come to the right place for advice and whilst I'm no expert your debt is lower than mine and your payment higher so I'm certain you'll be fine.

I'm sure someone with more knowledge than me will be along soon but in the meantime please don't feel too down as there really are ways through this and you will come out the other side - hugs x

[ClareSilver]

Do you own your own property and if you do, do you have a mortgage? Do you have any other assets at all?

[Shining]

Hi and welcome to the forum. Your income and expenditure will have been drawn up with the help of your IP and so I am confident it will be correct. Like you within the IVA I was better off as opposed to pre-IVA. You're doing your best to remedy your debt, don't be hard on yourself. Within the IVA although life won't be a bed of roses it is liveable and I have recently completed a full 60 months of payment and found it to be the best thing I've done financially for many moons.

Sounds like you're talking to someone already about setting up an IVA, so good luck with everything and remember you're not alone as you've found us and we're all at varying stages of our journey to debt freedom, so do keep in touch, generally somebody always around for support/advice or just a chat.

[Kelly O]

Hi Denise.gn and welcome to the forum

The most difficult part of being in debt is seeking the advice, you have done the most difficult part, when you start talking to someone about your debts often people tell me how much relief they feel.

Have you asked your IVA company how any equity will be dealt with?

Do you have any equity in your property?

If you have any concerns there is no harm in seeking alternative advice, don't be scared, you need to know all the facts so that you know exactly how any equity will be dealt with in the IVA and avoid any worry about the future.

When you know all the facts you will feel much better

[12 months to go]

hi denise

Til makes a very good point regarding the proposed monthly payment and I would echo this.

Kelly as you will have gathered from her post is a professional and raises a very valid point re any equity you may have

I can however genuinely and in all honestly advise you not to worry yourself sick over your current position, weve all been there and felt the same. Whilst im not an expert like Kelly, experience from trawling this forum for several years and indeed my own pre IVA debt situation tells me your IVA proposal is almost definately likely to be accepted.

£38,000 you could say for many may appear a high level of debt ( i only wish mine had been as low as £38k ) but in the scheme of many of us that have been in debt, its far less than many of us, so chin up , youve taken control in getting it sorted out. I know you may not feel like this currently , but let me assure you there is light at the end of the tunnel and your on your way to being worry and debt free

best wishes and remember when in doubt or worried, post your questions & concerns on this forum

[Denise.gn]

font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica">quote:<hr height="1" noshade>Originally posted by Til

Hi Denise and welcome to the Forum.

I'm sure others will be along to give you more detailed advice soon but I saw your post title and just wanted to send you a virtual hug and say please don't allow your debts to make you feel as if there is no hope.

Don't worry you've come to the right place for advice and whilst I'm no expert your debt is lower than mine and your payment higher so I'm certain you'll be fine.

I'm sure someone with more knowledge than me will be along soon but in the meantime please don't feel too down as there really are ways through this and you will come out the other side - hugs x

[Denise.gn]

font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica">quote:<hr height="1" noshade>Originally posted by Denise.gn

font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica">quote:<hr height="1" noshade>Originally posted by Til

Hi Denise and welcome to the Forum.

I'm sure others will be along to give you more detailed advice soon but I saw your post title and just wanted to send you a virtual hug and say please don't allow your debts to make you feel as if there is no hope.

Don't worry you've come to the right place for advice and whilst I'm no expert your debt is lower than mine and your payment higher so I'm certain you'll be fine.

I'm sure someone with more knowledge than me will be along soon but in the meantime please don't feel too down as there really are ways through this and you will come out the other side - hugs x


Thank you so much for your lovely response and kind words. I really appreciate it. I have had another terrible night and day, but reading these posts I know I am not on my own xx

[Denise.gn]

font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica">quote:<hr height="1" noshade>Originally posted by lesley_

Hi and welcome to the forum. Your income and expenditure will have been drawn up with the help of your IP and so I am confident it will be correct. Like you within the IVA I was better off as opposed to pre-IVA. You're doing your best to remedy your debt, don't be hard on yourself. Within the IVA although life won't be a bed of roses it is liveable and I have recently completed a full 60 months of payment and found it to be the best thing I've done financially for many moons.

Sounds like you're talking to someone already about setting up an IVA, so good luck with everything and remember you're not alone as you've found us and we're all at varying stages of our journey to debt freedom, so do keep in touch, generally somebody always around for support/advice or just a chat.

[Denise.gn]

Many thanks to you all for your responses. Whilst I would never want anyone to be in a debt position, it is reassuring to know that I am not the only one. I have had a terrible night and again today, but know that I have to get a grip on myself as making myself ill will not help the situation at all.
I spoke to my sister today, and am meeting her tomorrow to tell her everything, but funnily enough she had already guessed. So in addition to these posts, I do feel a bit better for also being able to speak openly with her without fear of her judging me.
Additional info re my position - my mother lives with me but I took the mortgage over from joint names to my name only, a few years ago. I haven't had the house valued for quite a few years, but house prices around where I live are not as high as they used to be, and whilst I know I have equity in my house, I am not sure it is as much as it was. However, it could be the same amount as my debt, or more likely lower.
I know if I have an IVA approved, I will either need to release equity from my house in year four or will have to extend my payments to six years. At present there is now way I would be accepted for a re-mortgage. Could the creditors demand at the meeting that my house is valued, and if the equity is the same as the debt, force me to sell it rather than accept the IVA?
My primary concern is keeping my house, ensuring that my mum is safe and paying off my debts. I just cant help the awful feelings in my stomach at present of panic that things have got this bad, and anger at myself for not controlling myself.

[Til]

Hi Denise

Huge well done for telling your sister and hope your meeting with her goes well. Its very hard to tell anyone about debt as it comes with such a stigma (wrongly placed most of the time) however I managed to tell 2 friends and I can't tell you how much it means to have someone know the truth and to be understanding. I am sure your sister guessing shows she is compassionate and hopefully she will be a strength to you as you sort things out.

Again I am not an expert on these things but our IVA has it written in that whilst we will try to remortgage if any equity exists (which it doesn't at the moment) or failing that pay up to an extra year in lieu of equity, the house will NOT be put up for sale under any circumstances.

These are all points that can and should be covered before your creditor meeting, to ensure that you are clear in what will happen later on, and now is the time to be sure you clarify these things with your IVA firm.

Its easy to feel so grateful to the company helping you that you agree to anything or just rush over the details (I know as I did it myself) but try to take deep breaths and ensure that anything not clear is explained to you in full and that the issue of your home is laid out in stone for your own peace of mind.

IVA's allow for homes to be protected and especially with your Mum living with you this is something your IP can establish right from the start x

[Shell.76]

hi, its always good to have someone close to talk too. i found it really helped me when i was starting out with my iva.my family and friends really made me feel better when i was feeling there was no light at the end of the tunnel, so talking to your sister tomorrow should be a big relief for you. an iva does help and theres nothing to be ashamed of, at the end of the day we are all human and make mistakes!!! hope things work out for you [8D]

[slushysnow]

Dont worry and stay positive You have made the decision to deal with the situation and thats the hardest step Your debt to you may seem a lot sure but a lot of people have way more than that so dont be put off or feel bad about the amount
Make your phnone call and speak with a professional they are the ones to guide you and help you Sooner you do that the better you will feel Dont put it off anymore
You dont have to let your mum know or she will not know The IVA is yours and you can make sure that all converstations and matter to deal with it will not involve your mum or anybody else ok

Basically all you are doing is trying to arrange a way to pay back the debt simple as that think of in that way and its not that bad trust me Forget the legality and leagal issues thats your Ips area of expertise they do that for you let them guide you and at the end of the day you will be better off and paying less per month and at some point in the near future you can start fresh and clear
Yes its very tough and you feel stupid and angry with yourself etc thats normal I did and how did I get to that point but hey hoh its done now cant turn the clocks back and now its time to get it sorted
Stay positive and dont worry about any of it everybody says that of course BUT they are the ones who have been where you are and are now finsihed or on the way so take heart from that Just a couple of months and you will back on course

take care

[Denise.gn]

Thank you so much. I hope once I have spoken to my sister and then decided which option to choose, I will start to feel a bit calmer. I feel bad for keeping on on about how I feel on this forum, as I know you have all gone through this, but it feels very raw and uncertain and scary at present.
I have gone on some forums where some of the comments have really worried me - I tend to do this at night time so no wonder I cant sleep. I tend to search for topics which are very negative, such as failed IVA, BR, trouble with debt collectors, and court orders, rather than also searching for positive comments and feedback. I suppose at present I am just seeing and looking for the problems rather than the positives and solutions. I read one post from a chap who entered an IVA but didn't change his spending, not sure if he went back into debt or was just spending on things he didn't need, but then had a nervous breakdown, ignored his IVA contact, and was made bankrupt. I know that if I went for an IVA I would make damn sure the monthly payments were made bang on time every month, and my spending would be seriously curbed just to the essentials, (Ironic seeing as the situation I am currently in). However some of these stories have just panicked me no end.
I also am considering a DMP but have also been terrified reading stories about constant phone calls to the home phone, (I don't want to expose my mum to this), debt collectors, CCJ and court orders, plus BR. Again if I went for a DMP, I would also make sure the payments would be bang on time, but these stories are giving me sleepless nights and endless anxiety.
What would be the other reasons for an IVA to fail other than not paying the monthly fee? Sorry for the long messages and continuous questions.

[luluj]

Denise ...you have had already received all the advice and encouragement from other forum members, but I wanted to say you are not alone...far from it..each and everyone one of us on here are here to support you ..there is always someone about that will be able to answer your questions and help you take then next step forward.

Don't look back now..what is done is done...in the past and cannot be changed ....I am really pleased you are able to talk to your sister...we found telling our immediate family the best thing - I know others say they can't do it - neither is right or wrong but the support we got from them during the IVA was amazing and without it at times we would have been in trouble...

let us know how you get on and remember we are here for you x