just new to all of this

[fletcherface]

HI EVERYONE BEEN READING ALL YOUR POSTS FOR A FEW WEEKS NOW GREAT TO KNOW THERE IS OTHER PEOPLE IN THE SAME SITUATION HAD OUR IVA APPROVED IN SEPTEMBER . WE ARE HAPPY IN ONE SENSE THAT OUR TERRIBLE DEBT SITUATION IS OUT IN THE OPEN NOW .MY HUSBAND DIDNT HAVE A CLUE ABOUT THE STATE OF MY FINANCES ITS SHOCKING THAT YOU CANT CONFIDE IN YOUR OWN HUSBAND BUT ITS LIKE A BIG SECRET YOU WANT TO KEEP QUIET.

[Skippy]

Welcome to the forum!

Everyone on here has been a big help to me over the last few months.

I know what you mean about confiding in your husband. I've been with my partner for nearly nine years, and he knew that I had debts, but not how much I owed. Even after I told him I couldn't cope with the repayments any more it was still a couple of weeks before I admitted to him that I owed £65k! My mum still doesn't know, and long may it stay that way!

How are you finding being in an IVA? It's great knowing that my debts are now under control, but every now and then I panic when I think this is how I live for the next 5 years - only myself to blame though!

One down, fifty nine to go until freedom!

[fletcherface]

THANKS SKIPPY HOW AM I COPING WITH IVA WELL COPING THE BEST I CAN .YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING TO INSTANTLY FEEL RELIEF BUT I THINK THAT IT FEELS MORE LIKE SHOCK ITS LIKE YOUVE COMMITTED SOME CRIME THE GUILT IS UNBELIEVABLE .BUT AT LEAST ITS OUT IN THE OPEN NOW AND GOT TO CONCENTRATE ON THE END . HOW ARE YOU COPING.

[Skippy]

I know what you mean - I'm very up and down at the moment. I was relieved when the IVA was first approved, but every now and then I feel guilty and have a good cry. Then I think myself lucky - I was in a mess and I did something to sort it out, and most of all I've got my health. I keep running out of money, but thankfully my partner is not in the IVA, so he is helping me as much as he can.

I'm scared to death that I am going to be made bankrupt now though - I've just noticed that the grand sum of £1.96 has been taken off my Natwest credit card this month as Ebay fees. I have no idea what it is for, and I cut up the card and returned it to Natwest. I've emailed Ebay and I'm going to ring my IP tomorrow, so fingers crossed...

One down, fifty nine to go until freedom!

[Dominic]

you will not contact your IP therei s no way you have done this.

[fletcherface]

UNFORTUNATELY MY HUSBAND IS IN WITH THE IVA NOT THROUGH HIS FAULT BUT MINE WE HAD A JOINT LOAN OFF A FEW YEARS AGO SO WE HAD NO CHOICE BUT TO INCLUDE THIS DEBT ASWELL SO I FEEL EVEN MORE GUILTY FOR INVOLVING HIM. I DONT THINK THAT 1.96 IS GONNA MAKE ADIFFERENCE THATS THERE FAULT FOR NOT CANCELING THE ACCOUNT,ANYWAY IM SURE THEY WONT MAKE YOU BANKRUPT OVER THAT ,COS THEY WILL GET NO MONEY THEN WILL THEY?

[MAY2006]

Hi fletcherface
I was the same as you my husband knew I had numerous credit cards and loans and also a joint loan, but the bulk of the debt 75% was in my name only. We never talked about it until I lost my job and although quickly found another one it was half the money and the situation became impossible.
It has made us stronger as a couple and the fact that he was so much more laid back and confident about the IVA succeeding helped me get through it, I felt physically sick everyday for months leading up to it and when we had to extend from 6 to 12 months because of the tax man I was ready for the nut house.
None of my family or my husbands family know only my best mate and I only told her half the figure initially, she knows the truth now and was a rock for me totally none judgemental.
Don't feel guilty I did and then I did'nt - yes I know I spent the money,but the lenders really need to take a more responsible attitude.
All credit info is held by the reference agencys, and they can see exactly what you owe.
Two months before it all went pear shaped for us, I applied for an Egg blue card - got it no problems limit £5500.00, I already had an Egg green - limit £7500.00 (up to it) and Egg loan of £10,000.
I'm more annoyed with myself than guilty that I got into such a mess and had such little self control, but the more I owed and the more stressed I got about what I owed the more I spent.
Good luck with your IVA the time will pass quickly

[fletcherface]

THANKS MAY I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN ABOUT THE LENDERS TAKING A BIT MORE RESPONSIBILITY WHEN LENDING MONEY.IVE HAVENT TOLD MY PARENTS THEY WOULD BE ABSOLUTELY GUTTED. IVE TOLD MY BROTHER WHO WAS VERY UNDERSTANDING I THINK ITS A GENERATION THING HE WAS SO BLASE ABOUT THE WHOLE SITUATION WHICH MADE ME FEEL ALOT BETTER THAT NOT EVERYONE WILL JUDGE ME ABOUT THIS MESS IVE GOT MYSELF INTO. IM STILL THE SAME PERSON[:)]

[Dominic]

it wsa my brother that made me face my situation, and i talked it over wiht my mum and dad too.

[Skippy]

I talked it over with my boyfriend, and eventually plucked up the courage to tell my mum! Everyone took it far better than I expected.

I totally agree that lenders should take a more responsibility - my 75 year old mother told me this morning that she had been accepted for a BHS store card! She's only got her pension!

One down, fifty nine to go until freedom!

[MAY2006]

Skippy - 3 weeks after my IVA was completed I had a letter from Tesco personal finance asking if I wanted a loan - had'nt they had enough of my debt to write off first time round was my thought as I chucked it in the bin.
I do get a lot of loan offers from Provident and other nasty lenders now too

[fletcherface]

May your spot on there i still get letters asking if i would like this loan and that loan ,do they ever learn.

[illihor]

That sort of thing just confirms how irresponsible all these finance companies are. The daft thing is they rarely base any offers of credit on a credit check, they send out the application and only do a check once they get it back all filled out.

I collect all the ones I get for the month and then write "Return to sender" and post them.(assuming there is and return address on the envelope) Maybe soon they will get the message when they keep getting their own junk mail through their letterbox.

On the way to a brighter future....

[Skippy]

Good idea Illihor!

I have spoken to Natwest this morning regarding the infamous £1.96, explained I am in an IVA and asked them to close the account and they asked was I sure I wanted to close it!!!

One down, fifty nine to go until freedom!

[kezza]

Hi Skippy,
Opened an account with Natwest this morning and they tried to get me to apply for a loan straight away after me just explaining that I was only opening a basic account because of money troubles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Have a loan they said, and what we can't get on the loan you can transfer to our credit card! Unbelievable!!