Thank you from the bottom of my heart to each and every single one who has sent me best wishes on the forum, on FB, private message or text. Cannot believe it's come to this so quick. Kallis messaged me this morning and I copy my reply to her below which sums up how I feel. He's here right beside me right now and I'm lucky in the fact I've been in work to fetch some work and can now work at home for a few days - don't want him to be alone for a minute.
Back in June he had 3 fat lumps removed via routine surgery, coped and recovered well. Soon after he was drinking excessively and peeing to the point of peeing in his sleep and lying in it on his bed...I took him back, no amount of tests come up with anything. The drinking settled, the peeing stopped and as with a lot we thought one of them things.. Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago and he started being fussy with his food, so we changed it to meat (tins) and he ate again, however the weight dropped off him last week , he's a shadow of his former self. He collapsed on his hind legs once, vets again and they booked him in for exploratory tests - the results of which are a mass in his chest that is solid (they couldn't aspirate) and basically he has a few days left with us. He's shaky on his legs due to losing muscle rapidly, but he's happy, he's not in pain but we know it's only days, they've given us 4 days tablets and wanted us to book him in but I'm not ready to book him in, I'll ring when we know for definite it's the end, I'm not prepared to make an appointment to end his life...I will know when he's had enough and I'll give him a dignified end. We didn't choose him he was a rescue dog he belonged to one of my students and I took him on without really knowing a history. Took him to a behaviourist for 4 weeks and solved his main problem but then the training began and I transformed him into a near perfect dog...he's given me so much and the one thing I'll give him is a dignified end, so long as he's not in pain and is mobile he'll remain by my side. I'll never let him suffer he did enough of that in his early life without me.
Thank you for all your support it truly is helping me in this extremely difficult time. I give people advice in respect of dogs most days but I need to accept my own advice and know I'll know when the time is right. Right now I can't imagine I'll ever be able to make that decision.
IVA final payment left the bank on the 26th January 2013...looking forward to a debt free future.
