New members & first time posters

[Adam Davies]

Hi
Post of the year so far Beans !!!
Regards

[MelanieGiles]

Has he won a prize Andy???

[Moneystinks]

Great post BOT!

OOOHHH a prize for BOT - does he get a prize?

X

[looktothefuture]

I would certainly agree with what has been written here. I am currently looking into an IVA after years of struggling with debt.

I can understand why people dont want to give out information and are scared to talk about their debts. Debt carries a terrible stigma within our society as we place so much on material possessions.

However, as I have come to realise, there is so much more to money and possessions and everyone makes mistakes. I would imagine all of us on this site have looked back on our lives and wished we could have changed things. However, everyone here should be proud that they have analysed their problems and are trying to deal with them.

People make mistakes everyday and building up debt is just one of them. The most important thing is to learn from them and move on. We are not the only ones to make mistakes with money. Afterall, several banks have lost millions recently from poor decisions and elements of greed.

I would advocate anyone with debt to be as open as possible. The best way to cure a problem is to share with others, as not only will you get advice, but hopefully you will not feel alone.

I think this site is a wonderful concept and everyone who has posted here should be proud of facing up to their debt and finding a solution to it[:)]

[kallis3]

Looktothefuture, what an excellent first post! I think you're after Beans on Toasts prize!

I am ashamed of the amount of debt I managed to get into, and proud of the fact that I am doing something about it.

However, I cannot bring myself to share my problems with anyone other than my husband and this forum.

Welcome to the forum, hope you manage to get an IVA sorted out, and please keep posting.

[looktothefuture]

Thanks kallis3. Glad your proud of sorting out the situation and so you should be.

Don't be ashamed of the amount of debt. I totally understand though why you only talk about it with your husband and on this forum.

I felt like that for a long time. I've run up tens of thousands of pounds of debt but just look at it now as a stupid mistake. As long as we have our health and our loved ones around us we can overcome anything.

Good luck with the future. Your money situation is only temporary and will become a distant memory one day[:)]

[kallis3]

I didn't even give it a thought at the time - just enjoyed living the high life, holidays, new cars, expensive Christmas presents etc.

It's a struggle, but I'll get through and, hopefully, come out the other side a better (and debt free) person!

[Soulgrowth]

What a lovely, inspirational thread your post has generated BOT [:)]

Debbie

[looktothefuture]

You certainly will kallis3. The situations we get ourselves in often make us better people when we come out the other side.

Debt is only a circumstance. Even though debt is a negative there are many positives when reflecting!! [:)]

[angela18]

Mr Beans, thats brilliant and you have put into words probably what everyone at some point felt.. I have never looked back after my first post on here.. I probably have asked some dumb questions, but then I have asked questions that I know alot of people have gained knowledge from.

Its abrilliant site and this forum is second to none!! long may it continue!!

[Beans on Toast]

Thanks everyone, and I hope those of you reading this thread in the shadows, will now be a little less wary of posting your questions. No one will bat an eyelid at the amount of debt you're in, and if, like a lot of us, you can't share your problem with family or friends, you will feel a great sense of relief once you open up [:D]

[greeneyes34]

After robbing peter to pay paul for a number of months I realised that I just couldn't sustain it any longer. I'm so pleased that i found this forum as it made me realise that I wasn't the only one in this situation. All in all my IVA application went very smoothly but it was always good to know that i could ask a question or find the answer on this forum. I only told my partner, dad and best friend to start with and they were all incredibly supportive. Once I knew it had been approved I told my mum and sister. I was really surprised by my mums reaction - she was really pleased that I had taken the step to deal with the problem rather than bury my head in the sand. My sister felt the same.

All I would say to anyone thinking of doing an IVA or DMP or even considering bankruptcy is to get all the information you can from whereever you can and you will feel better for it. Ultimately it is up to you what you do and who you choose to share your situation with, but be reassured, even if you can't tell close family or friends you can share your feelings here. No one will judge and you will get all the support you need.

sorry for the long post - once I got started i couldn't stop!

[Jan01]

What a great thread.
There is no shame in being in debt when like everyone on this forum is doing or looking to do something about it. I wish I had found this site at the beginning of my financial troubles as I truly thought I was the only one, I had no one to turn to and felt so alone. The little while I have been on this site I have felt so much better about my self because I know that there are others in the same situation and we are not bad people we are people that got into a muddle financially.
As Greeneyes said no one judges us.

Take care
Jan

[kallis3]

It isn't until you come on this site that you realise just how many people are in the same situation.

I used to think our debt was enormous (well, it is really), but there are people on here in a lot worse trouble than us. It really puts it into perspective.

As long as I can help people on here, even if it's only support as opposed to answering a technical question, I will keep posting.

I wished I had found it a couple of years ago, if I had I might have been further along into my IVA than I am, but I never even thought of even looking for anything.

Long may it continue.

[nolongeranxious]

What an Inspirational thread.
I haven't told anyone the truth about my debt mountain or my newly approved IVA. To be honest, there were times a month or 2 ago, when i was freeking out and desperately could have done with talking to a friend or family member. But i felt so ashamed. Also i didnt want to worry family members. Then i discovered my IP and this forum. My IP is brilliant, i have a great relationship with them and they are fine with me ringing them up whenever I need to. This forum is brilliant, sometimes i just 'lurk' and just reading the posts helps. Other times when i have felt at my darkest and most depressed i have posted. I have had so much friendship and support from the people on here. I think what helps me the most is the anonymity, the total honesty, the feeling that others have and are in the same position.
I have just had my IVA approved yesterday. Although I am not proud of my debt mountain, i am proud that i am facing up to it and am doing something about it.
Sorry for rambling, can't stop myself!