Parents

[UpToMyNeck]

Where would we be without them? Well not here for a start, but aside from that its strange how sometimes adversity can sometimes make you appreciate them all the more. My parents have never been aware of my debt problems, and having to go to them at the weekend cap in hand to put all my cards on the table and ask them if they could lend me the money to propose a lump sum IVA was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. They listened, showed shock at the appropriate time [:0] and then my mum cried. I have never had to ask them for anything before, and my brothers are much closer to them than I am as they live much closer, yet they still agreed unquestioningly to help me out of my predicament, even though it will take up virtually all of their savings it has taken them years to accumulate. As my mum said, its what parents do and maybe one day I will be in the same situation with my children (although I sincerely hope not!). I will pay them back, every single penny and more on top to make up for the interest they will lose, and as I told them I will never forget what they have done when really I have no right to deserve it after getting myself into such a mess. My IVA proposal is back on track!! [:D]

[kallis3]

Uptomyneck, what a lovely post! Full marks to you for plucking up the courage to speak to your parents, it's not something I could do. It must have been an awfully hard time for you.

I am so glad that they are going to help you and I am sure you will pay them back as soon as you can. What lovely supportive parents.

Hope it goes ok for you. Let us know how you get on.

[UpToMyNeck]

Thanks Kallis, I must admit I parked around the corner from their house for half an hour before plucking up the courage to knock on their door! I would not normally have dreamed of involving them, but I was running out of options, and as long as the lump sum IVA proposal is accepted by the creditors, I will always be glad that I did! [:)]

[jojo]

Hi Up To MyNeck, good for you for telling them! It took me two and a half years to tell mine and then only when I really had to cos my hubby lost his job! It was so hard and I was so embarrased, but they were fantastic and have helped us out by paying for us to have a holiday with the kids and them!So I agree, what would we do without them! Good luck with the proposal!

[kallis3]

I've never told mine. They are of the old school who never ran up debt and are both in their 80's. I'm an only child so I know it would kill them if they knew just how much debt we are in. It was bad enough when I got divorced (first one in the family to do that), so I don't want to be going through that again!

I shall keep my fingers crossed Uptomyneck.

[Shining]

That is great and I'm so glad and I'm sure you are that you plucked up the courage to ask and like your parents I'd do anything for mine, well within reason. All the best with your proposal x

[Michael Peoples]

Best of luck with the F&F and delighted that the weight is off your shoulders. It is always difficult explaining to clients that their spouses should be made aware and most find it a release when they tell them. Quite often those around you know that there is a problem and are glad to finally know what it is.

I had one husband say when told by his wife that she was £50k in debt and needed an IVA. 'That's great. I was worried you were having an affair'.

[MelanieGiles]

I was so pleased to receive an e-mail yesterday telling me that you have this matter sorted, due to the absolute generosity of your parents. I have no doubt that you will strive to repay their loan as soon as you can and I will be finalising your paperwork on Thursday, when I return to the office!

[Viki.W]

UpToMyNeck, that's a great post. Your parents sound fab. My Dad bailed me out too so I know exactly how you feel. Good luck for you F&F. X

[luluj]

I have to say telling my mum was the most trautmatic thing I had to do as she has never been a penny overdrawn - however she has been the most supportive of our family since and has really come up trumps - although she had some money we didn't offer a F&F as at the time we didn't even know these existed - parents are at the end of the day there to support you through good and bad times !

[skint]

Thats a great post Uptomyneck. My mother whom I live with has been supportive of me ever since my IVA started. But its so true actually plucking up the courage to tell them about it.

Now that I have nearly completed my third year it has been a very stressful time. My mom has agreed to put forward £8000 which I know is difficult as I know she has struggled to save that money. But she told me in no uncertain terms thats what families do. I didnt know what to say or do but just wrap my arms around her and say thank you.

[tori]

That's fantastic up to my neck! i am so pleased for you..and well done for plucking up the courage to tell your parents,as like you say it is a very hard thing to do..they sound absolutely fantastic though..Once my iva had been approved i plucked up the courage to tell my parents about everything,and i am so glad i did,as they have been nothing but supportive,understanding & helpful..it was also a huge relief too!!.. anyway,good luck with your proposal,i will keep my fingers crossed for you..take care.xx

[David Mond]

Sharing problems with Parents is perhaps one of the hardest things to do and I believe it depends on their age and health.

Initial shock and despair will always happen BUT in the end most parents will try and help if they can.

Family are very important and a problem shared is getting near to a problem solved. So glad for you Uptomykneck - it does take a lot of heart wrenching to do and it has worked out well for you.