Rubbish weekend, I think I'm cracking up

[missy80]

Sorry, just moaning really and all a rehash of stuff I’ve moaned about before.

I had such a sh*t weekend. I think it was finding out that when MBNA say they are getting their solicitors involved they actually mean their debt collectors. I don’t know why I didn’t think of it. Everytime I could hear a car pull up outside I leapt up – and they aren’t even sposed to be set on me till next Monday but I’ve got major paranoia. I worked myself into such a state I almost collapsed at the supermarket thinking about having to go back to my house, I was blacking out at the sides.

I managed to lure my flatmate out of the house yesterday cos I’m so terrified of someone coming to the door but obviously I can’t do that everyday (I can’t do it today even!) I would rather die than tell my flatmate about this – when we were sorting out bills for the house he didn’t want to get a joint account for them cos he thought it would tie him to my debts – and he only thinks I’ve got an overdraft. I actually disabled the doorbell before I went out today, I think I am cracking up.

It’ll be 4 to 6 weeks till my proposal is drafted and then waiting till the creditors meeting and then they might say no (they did last time). I actually don’t think I can live like this for the next 8, 10, 12 weeks. I’m already on antidepressants, I don’t think I can cope anymore.

I don’t know if it would just be better to go BR, I have just about got the money. The only thing is my landlord finding out – I think she’d throw me out. She ordered the last tenant out with a day to pack when they couldn’t afford the rent increase. I just read on here Melanie said she likes dealing with committed clients from day one – I guess I am not one of those people! So indescisive and scared. Sorry, just had such a bad weekend and terrible night’s sleep. Need to find a paper bag to breathe into!

xxx

[MelanieGiles]

Hi there and sorry to hear that you have had a rough weekend. If only MBNA could read this post to see how the actions of their collectors can have such an effect on some people.

I am afraid that I cannot give you any guarantees as to whether the representation of your IVA will be successfulm or that debt collectors will not call. But do remember that if they do, they are just normal people doing a normal job - nothing is personal against you, and what you should do is invite them in for a cup of tea and explain how much pressure you are under.

I would also recommend that you pay them something affordable, as this may well stop or postpone any action against you. Call me at the office this afternoon if you want to chat this through further.

[Skippy]

I'm sorry you've had such an awful weekend.

There have been a couple of instances on the forum of people calling at someone's house (although it rarely happens) and each time the person has been pleasant and approachable.

Give Mel a call and talk this over with her and hopefully you might feel a bit better about things xxx

[wannabedj]

Hi Missy

People react to these threats in different ways. Some react like you did and others just turn a blind eye. Like you, I had a debt with MBNA and I recieved all the letters and phone calls threatening legal actions and sending the boys round. But this would all disapear if you could make a small token payment (temp solution). I myself refused and didn't pay them a penny for over a year and not once did anyone come round. I recommend you NOT to take that course of action as each case is different. MBNA just want their money back and they will try anything to get it.
I know its easier than it sounds but try and put it to the back of your mind.

[missy80]

Thanks everybody

I have calmed down - slightly - and I will call Melanie's office after lunch. My main worry is not that people come to the door - I make an excellent cup of coffee for visitors! - more that someone, anyone, will find out. So if they could just come round when my flatmate is out then that would be perfect!

I am willing to make payments to people - I can afford it at the moment - not as much as they would like but a little. If it might hold them off while my form is being prepared then that would be great and well worth it.

Thanks again

xxx

[Tina Shortland]

Hi missy80, please don't crack up - they are not worth it!

If you haven't already, have a chat with Melanie - you will feel much better - it won't change how MBNA are acting but it may change how you are dealing with it.

You are committed, you are just scared and we're all here to support you - most of all Melanie.

As I understand things, a debt collection department or agency has no legal right to enter your home. They can only visit you if you agree to make an appointment which you will not do. If you have not done so already tell MBNA you are logging all contacts they are making with you and recording all calls and that this is affecting your health and well being. As Melanie says making a small token payment may alleviate things. Try contacting the Office of Fair Trading for more information on the harrassment by creditors if you want to.

Use this forum as much as you need - this situation WILL NOT continue as it currently is. When you have strong moment, remember this is just a big company trying to get some money back and currently being unreasonable in the way they are doing it. They cannot hurt you, you are doing nothing wrong and many many people have been where you are now and got through the otherside.

We're all here for you and you will be ok.

[missy80]

Oh Tina, that made me a bit weepy!

It doesn't do me any good that I no longer have an internet connection at home and I can't get on here to calm myself down a bit. All my forms and bits of paper are into Angela now so hopefully the time will pass fairly quickly, who knows.

Thank you very much

[missy80]

Oh Tina, that made me a bit weepy!

It doesn't do me any good that I no longer have an internet connection at home and I can't get on here to calm myself down a bit. All my forms and bits of paper are into Angela now so hopefully the time will pass fairly quickly, who knows.

Thank you very much

[Tina Shortland]

Oops sorry!

Angela is a complete star so she'll look after you and before we know it you'll be on here telling us the date of your creditors meeting!

Shame you don't have connection at home - you'll just have to say little mantras to yourself and do lots of counting to ten!

Take care,

[alvie]

Hi Missy80

Don't worry about the landlord finding out which is unlikely! you have many rights as a tenant and a landlord cannot just you chuck you out because you are in financial difficulties. How, she managed to chuck the previous tenants out is unbelievable! Hold in there, and I know its hard but try not to worry. Remember it costs companies money to send out bailiffs but only costs a phone call to threaten you with one!

[MelanieGiles]

I've not managed to speak to Missy80 today as when she called I was in a meeting - but I will return the call tomorrow - mid morning probably as I have a first thing appointment as well.

The support you are all providing to her on the forum is outstanding.

[Julie]

Hi Missy, how are you feeling now hun?

I could swing for MBNA for putting this pressure on you - I know Melanie and her team will pull out all the stops to help you. It really does get better and we're all here to help.

Please take care of yourself xx

[DMB]

Surely if you make a token payment to them like Mel said then you are favouring one creditor? Or have i missed something?
Please dont shout me down i am not a regular on here and with the help of the forum am learning the ins and outs which will hopefully help me if my Iva is accepted?

[Tina Shortland]

Hi DMB - I would certainly hope you wouldn't be shouted down - whether you're a regular or "part-timer"!!!

Its great having these kind of quetions asked as it will also help the many people reading from the wings and wanting to ask the same question but not daring to post

You are right in that if only a token goes to one creditor and not the others it is preferrential treatment which is not advised but this is an extraordinary situation where the pressure from this creditor is beyond reasonable and needs to be addressed.

Glad you are finding the forum helpful.

Regards,

[missy80]

Hi everybody

Much better today, thank you for all being so nice and patient with me. Have spoken to Angela and she has sent me a really long email. She's spoken to someone at MBNA to stop them phoning me which would be amazing.

Feel lots LOTS better today and that is almost 100% down to you guys and Mel's office so thank you so much. Will now go back to stressing about my divorce and other related issues!

Big kisses

xxx