Almost there with plucking up the courage

[mike.s]

Hi everyone,
Almost there with plucking up the courage of speaking to someone about my debt. I have to as there is no way out this month, late on one payment and the others will be late in the next couple of days and I can't pay any of the minimum payments this time. Everyone on the forum has been so helpful and encouraging but I'm starting to panic again and the heads slipping back in the sand. I owe about £45k on credit cards (in my name) and we are four years into a ten year £10k loan (joint with my wife) Our house is up for sale and has been for the last six months and if it goes for close to the asking price it should leave us with about £32k.

having looked at the forum again I'm concerned about some of the postings about Northern Rock, our loan is with them. Most of the debt on the cards is with MBNA. If Northern Rock wont accept an IVA does this mean I will have to go bancrupt? Also if the credit cards wont freeze the account and interest will I have to find this months minimum payments and keep paying them? I really don't know how I will find any extra money to pay them, I will end up robbing Peter to pay Paul again and get further into debt and this will only postpone the inevitable. I really don't know what to do, I thought I was getting close to a solution but now I'm worried sick again.
Thanks for listening
Best wishes Mike

[aguise]

Hi again Mike.
The best thing to do would be to talk to someone. Ring a couple of companys as said i think the ones on this site is where I would start. They dont charge for initial calls and by trying a couple you would at least see if they think the same. Dont worry aboiut ringing they are used to debt and i am sure they wont be shocked with anything you say, I understand you feeling like that as I did but i was so comfortable and felt so much better after.
Try not to stress yourself and get going on sorting it out, after you will feel so much better.

ang


Please visit my blog at http://aguise.blogs.iva.co.uk/

[scaredkez]

i agree with aguise, take that step now and talk to someone, at least you will then know what direction you will have to take, i know it is very stressful, but leaving it and leaving it will only make it worse, go on make that call, we are all with you whatever way you have to go.
kerri

Please view my blog at: http://scaredkez.blogs.iva.co.uk/

[bagpuss]

Hiya Mike...whats the worst that could happen if you ring someone...? your debt wont be worse, no-one will know...you wont be judged...but you WILL be clearer, you WILL feel better and you WILL be 1 step closer to getting this sorted.

You can do it Mike...i know its nerve racking but it cant be any worse than you are feeling now.

Please....xx

Angie xx


My IVA Story......http://bagpuss.blogs.iva.co.uk/2007/09/ ... iva-story/

[lily]

Hi Mike

As the others have said it is only a professional that can advise you re northern rock, I do know they are rejecting most but creditors do like full and finals and if they havent got a majority vote.....

We all understand how youre feeling about not paying the creditors but I really think it is for the best, at the end of the day, you are only increasing the problem and minimum payments are a pee in the ocean anyway. If they add interest thats them increasing the debt and not you.

You will be harrassed by them, they can be relentless but, they are just doing their job and need to meet a target. Dont give them the upper hand, tell them you are aware that you owe but you simply cant pay, you are trying to sort things out and will advise....

You really need to speak to someone as soon as possible, its only delaying the inevitable by waiting, its hard Mike, I know. Youre not a failure, by admitting you have fallen into the debt trap, its way too easy.

There is a solution to every problem, you will find yours. You need a take a little step each day and not worry too far into the future as the bigger picture can sometimes send you rignt back under the duvet. I know cos I have been there. You have come so far in this last week, the best thing to do is not look back.

lily

[mike.s]

hi guys
Thank you all so much for taking the time to talk. Finding it all a bit too much to take at the moment, the weight is breaking the shoulders once again but much better knowing you are all there, I really do apreciate it, thank you! Realy choked right now, huge lump in the throat and and a bigger one in the chest area, really need to sleep on it, god damn why wont they give us a break! Cheers guys, speak soon.
Very best to you all and thank you so much
Mike

[lily]

Take care mike, I hope you can ease the burden soon, thinking of you and your family.

Have a damn good cry, release those stress hormones, and before you say youre a guy, you laugh when youre happy dont you???

Just for today let it all go, you can get through this.

lily

[Shining]

Oh Mike, do it just ring, I can remember a couple of weeks ago, I had to do it for the first time, and felt so low, but when i realised people weren't judging me, it got easier. You'll know when you find the right IP, they make you feel human again after months of worrying, it felt just right for me. Hope you get sorted soon.

[scaredkez]

mike, just do it ring someone, as i have already said everyone of us is behind you because we have all been there, let it all go, cry if you need to, doesn't make you any less of a man than any other, in my book it makes you more of a human, its a hard time to finally realise the mess you are in, head up, take the step now! don't leave it.
kerri

Please view my blog at: http://scaredkez.blogs.iva.co.uk/

[Skippy]

Give a couple of companies a call - that is the next step to putting an end to the stress. When I made the phone call I didn't actually know how much I owed, and when they added it up I burst into tears with the shock! They are used to dealing with 'people like us', and believe me, you will feel better when you have made the phone call.

Good luck x

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is the present - a gift to make the most of.

View my blog at http://skippy13.blogs.iva.co.uk/

[jasperyogi]

Hi ya mike,
Just wanted to say I hope your feeling abit better this morning. Please take the advice of the other posters and ring someone today, we thought our world was ending and we would never find a way out of the box we were in, but honestly, after the initial phone call we felt that the weight had been taken off us and that someone else had taken the burden, and finally there was a light at the end of the tunnel. So please call today and take that first step to getting this sorted and getting your life back. We are 3 months into our IVA now and life is back to normal....well apart from the spending sprees of course!!
All the best and dont forget we are here for you.

Why spend life worrying...when you can spend it smiling!!

[Jo Rolland]

Hi Mike,

I take it you mean the joint loan is with Northern Rock? If this is the case and they voted against an IVA it would not be sufficient for the IVA to fail as they would not be more than 25%. Also once your property is sold, your wife can pay this loan off with her share of the proceeds of the sale, the remainder of the proceeds would be paid to your creditors via the IVA.

Don't delay in speaking to someone and I hope this helps.

Good luck


Jo Rolland
Debt Alternatives
www.debtalternatives.co.uk

[tracy.h]

Hi Mike

as the others say once you have spoken to a professional you will feel so much better,and be able to start to put your life into some order and look to the future.
I to have nr but unfortunatly they are my biggest creditor so i will plod on and wait til im in a better position to offer f+f.
I really do understand the pressure you are feeling,but you are now doing something positive and that is a good thing.
We all post on here for a reason and the support is a lifeline to many,let us know how you get on either way somebody will always be here even if its just for a chat or moan or even a cry.
Take care

Tracy

[iva.com]

Hi Mike,

If you are looking for an IVA firm to speak to take a look at our site. We maintain a list of IVA firm and their Insolvency Practitioners. We also publish client reviews of the services that they provide to help you to choose which is the best firm for you.

As the other posters have said the first step is often the most difficult but it is really the best thing to do.

Good luck with finding the right solution for you. Please let us know how you get on.

Kind regards,
Terry Balfour
IVA.com

IVA.com - The IVA Comparison Site
100s of reviews, All IPs and IVA firms rated.

Use our IVA firm comparison tool to find best IVA firm for you:
http://www.iva.com/iva_comparison_1.asp

[mike.s]

Hi everyone,
Thank you all once again, hit an emotional wall last night and everything seemed hopeless again, but feeling much better now and back in positive mode after talking to you all again. Pants day on the market again just about broke even, but I'm beginning to wonder wether it's me as my mind is miles away and I'm finding it difficult to concentrate, I'm sure it must show to my customers, not great when your self employed, I just feel so tired all the time. Anyway moan over, slap with a wet fish and back to positive mode. My wife is taking the final part of her driving instructors test tomorrow so fingers crossed she passes and that would be a huge help. It also looks like we may have a buyer for the house so we could soon be in a position to offer a chunk of money, hope it's enough, really can't go on in zombie mode for much longer. Day off tomorrow (Wednsday and I am determined to speak to someone, ur all right what is the worst that can happen, things can't really get any worse, can they? I only say tomorrow not today as I've only just got back and can't face it right now, I know that probably sounds like I'm putting it off and maybe I am but I have a few more deep breaths to take. Thanks Jo for putting my mind at rest over Northern Rock, that was really worrying me and I was beginning to think what's the point of going through all of that if it's going to be rejected anyway, so that has helped, cheers. Also one other thing I picked up on you say with my wife's share of the proceeds of the house, don't really understand what you mean, wouldn't all of the money just be thrown into the creditors pot, leaving us with nothing? Also another thing really worrying me is would we be able to rent somewhere once I go into an IVA? Sorry guys with so many questions I know the only real answer is to pick up the phone and talk to someone. Huge help having you there everyone, thanks again for listening, I will let you know what happens.
Best wishes to all
Cheers
Mike