Thank you for all your kind thoughts, they really do help at this time.
My Dads death was so sudden and it was a massive shock to us all.
I don't know whether that is a good thing being so quick because he never suffered but I suppose that there is no good or bad way.
We have got all of the horrible things like closing bank accounts etc sorted and now we've got to try and get back to normality...if thats possible
Phil, don't rush into anything as there really isn't any need and if you need any advice. please don't hesitate to ask.
I do know how you feel and what you are going thru, just take care of yourself and your family, thats the most important thing.
Endsmeet Yes my dads death was sudden and unexpected so still in a trance,numbness like state,gut you are right the horrid sorting all the paperwork out is distressing,and with the funeral to come things will get worse, however life does go on and only time will heal,again thankyou for your support and advice as to everybody elses,I hope things start getting better for you.
Phil
My Mother died really suddenly and unexpectedly also, Christmas 2006, in her own home and peacefully, it was a terrible shock. I did actually blame myself as I had just told her about the debt and she had offered to help but I refused, my debt, my problem. It was really hard at first, like you say just numbness and emptyness. Then when I was feeling a little better I begain to rationalise it all. On the one hand I wanted her back but on the other I was kind of glad she never suffered, she died with dignity and no fuss, just how she would have wanted, she never wanted to be a burden to us, she never was.
I was told that when a family member dies after an illness, there is an end, to suffering, although their is still a shock when it finally happens, grieving will then begin. When someone dies suddenly its harder in the fact that the grief is delayed the sad time starts with the overwhelming shock and disbelief often with questions without any answers.
So I really feel for you both right now, its such a hard and difficult time. If its any consolation it does get better with time.
Wxtra special love and thoughts and prayers to you both and your families.
Endsmeet, I am sorry to hear about your loss as well.
Sharing from experiences of dealing with debt
The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.
Bob Marley. http://kallis3.blogs.iva.co.uk
May I extend my condolences too. In this situation all IP's would agree a payment break to help cover the funeral costs. Repayment by either adding an extra month on end of term or extra contributions throughout its duration.
Regards, David Mond, Insolvency Practitioner for over 46 years. Personal Insolvency Practitioner of the year 2012, Personal Insolvency Practitioner of the year finalist 2013 & 2014 awarded by Insolvency & Rescue Magazine and 2015 finalist for Personal Insolvency Firm of the Year.
Thank you all for your kind thoughts, none of my family or friends are aware of my IVA so with Payplan allowing me to miss a month was one less thing to worry about.
I'm sure that they will give Phil the same as they offered me.
HI Endsmeet No not yet busy sorting all the arrangements first,Will get on the phone tomorrow to them,Will let you know how I have gone on,Thanks for your thoughts.
Phil I am so sorry to hear about your dad, I lost mine suddenly about 14 months ago and know how much of a shock it can be. I am with Payplan and I am sure they will be fine. You should also try the benefits agency as if he had a small pension sometimes they can help. Take care and make sure you look after yourself at this sad time Locko
