Hi All, I haven't posted on here for a while - being honest once my IVA was approved everything settled, a huge weight came off and I just got on with life.
Then.....the end of last month, my husband ups and leaves and is now living with his new girlfriend and her family - total shock after 8 years of being together and whats more he had only known her 3 weeks when he moved in (and she was my 'friend')....I digress...he took all the money, all but £350, out of the bank account the day before over £600 worth of bills (including our mortgage) was due to come out and have left me potless with the two kids and everything to pay, including the IVA. He has said he will only pay me what the CSA calculator says he should for the kids, on payday this month and Im am literally scared at how im going to make all the payments, he won't even recognise that his name is on the mortgage so he has to pay some!
I have contacted my IP (Melanie's team) and im going to do another income and expenditure, but I can almost 100% say that its going to contain no disposable income!
Is the best idea now to go bankrupt? Does he have to as well (even though he now has a HUGE 'disposable' income due to him not paying toward the house anymore. Will I be bale to keep my home? It has negative equity and is a part buy/part rent.
Any advice PLEASE
Is there only you in the IVA? or is it a joint (interlocking) IVA? Don't give up without a fight... why should you? Bankruptcy has to be a last resort and he should be made to face up to his repsonsibilities. I am sure Melanie and her team will be able to come up with something, such as some payment breaks until things are a bit more settled. I hope they can sort something out for you.
Thank you. Its interlocking. He won't even speak to me now because I called my ex friend some choice names when I found out (I think his exact words were 'You are being a bit unfair to her'), so sorting amicable solutions isn't an option.....All I want is to be able to keep this house. I don't want to have to uproot the kids and there is pretty much no way I would be able to afford the IVA payments on tax creds and the £100 per month average self employed job I do
Sorry to hear about the break up -- I will not comment upon my thoughts regarding your (now) ex ... the built in word censor would go nuts !!!!
You are with one of the best with Mel and her team, if there's a way round all this she will come up with it. Make an appointement with your local CAB for advice on every other front.
My opinions are merely that .. opinions based on experience. Always seek professional advice.
IVA Completed 23rd July 2013 .... C.C. 10th January 2014
Thanks Foggy, for the advice and the non-mentioned expletives! Ive taken legal advice already, but these things are a long, lengthy process and an IVA payment is due on the 28th of this month
I think that the IVA's can be separated and a new revised plan for just your portion of the debts can be looked into. I know this must be a most worrying time for you, but I am sure Melanie will be able to advise you accordingly. It is going to be a tough time for you of that there is not doubt, but don't forget we are all here to help even if it is just for you to get things off your chest and have a rant. I am sure Melanie will be online later tonight... so try not to stress, I know this is easier said than done. Sending you hugs of reassurance
I, too, am sure Mel will be on later (as long as there's no sport on involving hunky males in small shorts .... did I say that out loud ????? )..Anyway ......
Have you asked Mel for a short payment break to allow you to sort things out ( rather than falling into unauthorised arrears)?
My opinions are merely that .. opinions based on experience. Always seek professional advice.
IVA Completed 23rd July 2013 .... C.C. 10th January 2014
Foggy wrote:
I, too, am sure Mel will be on later (as long as there's no sport on involving hunky males in small shorts .... did I say that out loud ????? )..Anyway ......
Not tonight... that would be Fridays and Saturdays when Superleague is on .... well that's where I see sport involving hunky males in small shorts [:D] [:D]
I would definitely echo foggy's advice of asking for a payment break immediately. This will give you a little breathing space to sort things out.
Sorry about your circs - that's the lowest of the low there, and how you can be accused of being unfair is beyond me!
There's only 1 person out of the 2 of you that should be living in a cardboard box. Hopefully Mel can sort something for you to relieve the pressure and help you to sort out the main pain in your life.
Once this is all sorted just sit back and watch- I believe in karma!
Can you contact me directly, as I ought to be able to recognise you from your forum name but right now I have a mental blockage! We can then arrange to have a chat directly to see what options there will be. Don't worry about the payment due out on 28th - simply cancel the standing order until we have formulated a plan - which will have to involve your husband as well given that he is also a client who is subject to an IVA.
So sad for you, but let us take the burden of the debt issues in the interim.
Hi Thrifty,
I did notice on fb that your circumstances had changed but didn't like to intrude as your friends in your area (real life friends not pc ones) seemed to be helping although I have kept abreast of it all. Sounds like your ex is a low life who you are better off without. Who needs friends like that as well. It is like a double betrayl when things like this happen, as you have not only lost a hubby but a friend as well. I feel for you honey and if you ever need a shoulder you know my name on fb just message me.
Listen to Mel and let everyone help you, we will all try our best to not see you and the children in a cardboard box.
If life is what you make it, I must have been in a strange mood when I made mine
