Hi all im new to this forum and have decided its time for me to face up to my debt!
I have about 57k worth of personal unsecured debt (eeek!) I feel sick when i look at that, although I am not 100% this figure is up to date. If i am honest I have been totally stupid when it has come to handling my debts over the years. I moved house and didnt inform my creditors about my change of address. I also got married and so all of my debt is actually in my maiden name. Im fed up with this niggling in the back of my mind and i need to get it sorted. I have told the hubby about it and he was to say the least shocked![:(]
He has debts about 9k he is currently struggling to pay as i had to leave my job last year. I have 2 little ones and one on the way so cant currently look for work as childcare is very expensive and so we rely on just my husbands salary.
Also when we got married last year i totally forgot to inform tax credits about my change in circumstance until this year once i recieved my renewl pack. I totally panicked and rang them to tell them of my error. So now we have a massive tax credits over payment to pay back too (my stupid fault). They are willing for us to pay it back monthly but they are wanting £250 a month from us which I have agreed to as I was totally worried we were going to get into trouble. We will have to cut right back on things to meet these repayments. But it will also mean that we have less then minimum payments for my husbands creditors and that without paying the debt of my own i have been avoiding!
We cant go near bankruptcy as my husband would lose his job so maybe i was thinking an iva would be a good option.
although i dont know if my tax credits could be included in an iva???
We could probably afford about £400-£450 in repayments a month on a guess but definately no more then that! Woud an iva accept that for the amount of debt we have? I have a little one on the way so we would need money for nappies and milk etc.
My husband has gone to stay with a friend for a couple of days as he feels really disspapointed with me and i dont blame him! I really dont want to lose my marriage over this and so i feel its time i grew up and took responsibility for my situation.[:(]
Any advice on my situation would be gratefully recieved as im in a big hole and cant seem to get out of it!
Will creditors i have been avoiding decline my iva as i havent been in contact with them?
First of all well done on facing up to your debts and shareing this with your husband. He has reacted badly to this, but perhaps the way he has dealed with the shock is understandable and have no fear he will return. I have often seen clients in exactly the same situation as you find yourself now.
From the information you have presented, I think an IVA would be very workable for you, so the sooner you seek professional advice about yours and your husband's debts the better. He may not need an IVA given that his debts are quite low, but it will depend upon circumstances.
Needtofacethings - Welcome to the forum, I cannot add to anything else that Mel has said, except most of us on here have/had our own story to tell, Sometimes just to know that your "not alone" in this situation can help.
Please use the forum for information/advice /or just a good moan
Hi - welcome to the forum. I'm glad you have come clean and are facing up to things. I was in your position to a few months ago. Hubby wasn't happy but glad I sorted things out.
You say your husband would lose his job if you went bankrupt. Would this be the same if it was only you that went bankrupt?
Definitely contact 2 or 3 companies from www.iva.com to get some free and impartial advice. You've already taken the hardest step. Alternatively you could contact someone by clicking on the link for recommended IVA firms on this site. There are some great people around who won't judge you and will be only too willing to help you find a solution.
I'm sure hubby will be back soon. It'll take some time to get used to this but I'm sure in time he will be pleased that you came clean and got it all out in the open.
I don't think the creditors will mind that you are going into an IVA - some money is better than no money!
Hi and a big welcome to the forum you have the right choice to face up to your debts i learnt the hard way and as much as we try and kid ourselves it never goes away but on a much more positve note we had similar debt levels to yourselves and had overpayments to child tax credits that were all incluided in our IVA that was excepted last month even though it may be real tough at the moment there is a way forward most of the people on the forum have been in our or in the same position stay positve and take the next step by contacting a few IVA firms or cccs good luck and i hope your hubby returns home very soon
Thank you all very much for replying to me! I suppose I could go bankrupt if an iva was not accepted but i would prefer to try for an iva first as frankly the sound of bankruptcy scares me! If you havent noticed i dont face things easily, but this i must!
Im very chuffed i found this site! I am going to contact a couple of companies tommorrow once i have spoken to my husband and read into an iva a bit more,but it is sounding like a very good option for us!
Welcome from me as well - please speak to one or two companies before making a decision.
The experts who post on here come highly recommended but you can also visit www.iva.com for a list of companies and reviews. The advice is free and impartial.
Sharing from experiences of dealing with debt
The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.
Bob Marley. http://kallis3.blogs.iva.co.uk
hey,i m one of the husbands,who had the thing happen to me...it wa a shock,granted,my wife was totally distraught and had been keeping it in for years...i was more bothered that she had attempted to keep the turmoil to herself...what you need to do for your sanity is get it sorted,we had 60K!!!! grant thornton have got us on a 60 mth iva paying 252 per mth,it was surprisingly easy and 6 mths in,my relationship is better(she was always reserved,understandable)i have more money!! and am so happy we went iva.a problem shared is a problem halved and nobody needs to have that kind of stress to deal with...he ll come round and if he don t ,at least you get to learn about somebody and if you want them at your side if the **** really hits the fan....good luck and honestly,happiness is so much more important than being miserable.
My hubby had no idea what was going on - I sorted the finances out and told him things were ok even when I knew we had problems. We came through it and are stronger than ever now.
Thankfully things worked out ok for us.
Do speak to one or two companies before making a decision - you need to be happy with the company you choose.
Sharing from experiences of dealing with debt
The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.
Bob Marley. http://kallis3.blogs.iva.co.uk
Good luck - I am sure once the hurt of not knowing wears off he'll be fine.
And don't stall in finding a reputable company to help. I wish I had done it 2 years ago instead of faffing around thinking I would win the lottery in the meantime!
hiya, and welcome to the forum.
just wanted to say well done on facing up to your debt, its a brave thing to do.
i am sure as the others say your husband will come around.
good luck for your future.
kat
IVA accepted 6th May 2011, Full and Final accepted 17th April 2012.
When my hubby realised our problems it made him ill - thankfully we could sit down and talk about it and we're still going strong today.
Sharing from experiences of dealing with debt
The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.
Bob Marley. http://kallis3.blogs.iva.co.uk
Needtofacethings dont discount bankruptcy as an option to remove the debt burden. Let someone in the know explain it to you but given the fact you are not working and hubby has his own debts BR may be the way to go.
Paul
Discharged today the 8th feb 2012. View is much brighter now.
Continuing to rebuild our credit worthiness.
