I have had enough of life. I am in so much debt, with pay plan, house on the market because I can't cope. I have a 5 yet old and I an in a domestic abusive relationship. My daughter is now talking to me like dirt like her father. The only way out of this is ending my life because as I am being reminded each day the reason why we are in this mess is because of me. I got paid on the 24th may, I have £20 iny purse. I have just called the domestic violence helpline and they want to see me and my daughter which will make things worse. He has just smashed up my tumble dryer and I can't dry any clothes as it is raining. I have been painting the house for the past 2 days to make it more presentable and that's not good enough because I used the wrong paint
I want to die, I just want this life to end. Even when I sell my house I am still condemned to a life with him but no debt, I don't know what is worse. Sorry everyone who are trying so hard but for me debt and living with him is hell and I can't go on anymore
darceydoo - you do need to speak to someone urgently - either your GP out of hours if needs be or some self help groups - debt can make you feel very low and is reconised as a factor in some mental health issues. but the important person in this is you - you also need to contact the police if you or your children feel threatened. The fact you say you dont want to die - means that with support you can get throught this.
Ring the police speak directly to domestic violence unit now !!
Last edited by ginger3232 on Sun Jun 03, 2012 9:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I agree with ginger. You don't have to stay in a violent relationship. You could ring Samaritans, or, the police. Why do you feel you have to stay in relationship? I was with someone violent but I did get out. I did an IVA and myself and my daughter are now safe and, hopefully, financially secure. Please don't think you should end things. You have a five year old who needs you, and you sound like a good mum. Please seek help. It will get better!!
IVA started Sept 09. Glad to be on the way to being debt free
Darcey - I totally agree with ginger. You need to speak to someone asap. Call the samaritans, they will help you or, as ginger says, the police and they will put you in touch with a refuge while you sort things out.
Please don't do anything stupid - we are here for you. If you want to speak off forum to Kallis then let me know and she will conact you,
darceydoo -at the moment the debt IS not the important issue - you and your children are, you all need to be safe and secure without feeling threatened - once this has happend you be able to tackle you debt head on
No I can't if they come round he will get even worse, I have threatened him with the police before and he smashed something else up. I need to get out of this life I am living. I am worried my house won't sell quickly for me to pay debts off. My secured debts will be paid but my iva creditors will want the rest so I won't have anything to start over. My daughter is better off with her grandparents. I have made a total cock up of my life and as he sayes to me I am fffffing useless and it is true. Police won't help, been there before
darceydoo - you need to be totally honest with the police - if they feel he is a threat to you or your children - they will either restict him or prevent him coming back to the house - but for that to happen you need to tell them the full truth. Attitude and services have tighnten up on domestic violence - they reconise it has a long term impact on everyone - including your children - so the services tend to take a more active approach
Last edited by ginger3232 on Sun Jun 03, 2012 9:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Can't you stay with your parents. Ring police when you are there and safe. Trust me, there are ways of getting out of a violent relationship. Forget the debt for now, just try and find a refuge, if you can't stay with family or friends. You don't have to live like this, trust me!! Please call someone asap
IVA started Sept 09. Glad to be on the way to being debt free
I know phoning the police is scary as I'm sure you're afraid of what he'll do if you call them. They have much better rules/laws now. They will make sure you are safe before he is released. Please seek help
IVA started Sept 09. Glad to be on the way to being debt free
I can't add anything to what the others have already said but I wanted to say please get help. You and your daughter deserve better than this and the police will be able to help you.
Good luck and please let us know how you're getting on x
I am saddened to read this, please please please seek help for your safety and that of your child/ren.
Your life will be back on track very soon but in the meantime don't even consider your debt. Get yourself safe. Nobody should be livng in fear of their partner or being spoken to in the way you are.
We're here to support you remember that, you're not alone.
Do you have a close friend to confide in who can help?
IVA final payment left the bank on the 26th January 2013...looking forward to a debt free future.
Darcey - get out now. Go and stay with your parents or on a friends sofa. Anything is better than an abusive partner. Treat is like an adventure to your daughter.
Please don't stay. You can move on - it will seem tough at first but you can do it.
