Just wanted to wish you luck, I am new to this site and over the last 3 days have been glued to it. It is a huge support network, we are all in the same boat (it may be feeling like the Titanic at present!) but you will get through it.
I know the feeling when you are scared to actually add up the debts but once you speak with professionals you begin to feel more positive and I'm sure that your wife will come round and you'll be support to each other.
Now that you've written down an initial budget then you have something to discuss. Try ringing some IPs up as they will help you - for free and without obligation. Have you considered all the options yet - DMP, IVA or BR? How are your debts split between you both? It may be your wife could avoid any formal arrangement if the debts are mostly in your name. You need to understand these options, that is why talking to a professional is good advice.
I went to the CAB first off and whilst the people there were helpful, the CAB doesn't have the time or resources to offer the personal service that (in my experience) an IP firm can. (I'm with Melanie Giles by the way.)
Debt problems, what debt problems? I'm not in De Thames, I'm in De Nile.
Good luck with your meeting today and certainly seek some advice from an IP. You and your wife have separate circumstances and must be treated differently. If she is working and can pay her debts this is what she should do. You could consider bankruptcy or a temporary DMP until you find a job. If you decide to go down the bankruptcy route your property should be protected since it is in negative equity and your wife can buy out your interest.
Do get some proper professional advice as soon as you can. No harm to the CAB - they do a very good job with limited resources, but they do not work in the same world that we do - dealing with the creditors and negotiating terms all of the time. I am sure that they would have also advised you to do this - and you will find a much better experience and support readily to hand by just a quick phone call or e-mail.
Good luck and don't worry too much about your wife - we girls tend to worry more, but I am sure she will soon be fine with the idea.
Do speak to a couple of IVA companies to get some advice as Melanie said - they have the expertise.
We started off talking to the CAB. All they did was suggest bankruptcy or IVA.
I can personally recommend Melanie Giles firm as I am one of her clients. I have a joint IVA with my husband. Our debts were just over £87K and our IVA went through with a dividend of 27p.
