Help needed asap

[rubberball]

Hi
Sorry this is a long one.
Let me firstly say I adore my wife and will stand by her & help her.! But……

She has run up a huge amount of debt yet again. A few years back I bailed her out with a re-mortgage to pay off her debts on the understanding that it would come off her share of the equity. She promised me it would not happen again. Low behold this January she is in the same situation only much worse. She has lost most of it gambling and we sat down & cut up all her credit cards on new years day so at least we have put a stop to it. It would not be so bad but she has not even got anything to show for it. I nice car & brand new kitchen & wardrobe would have been easier to swallow but it pass it over to unscrupulous companies is a bitter pill to swallow. I accept she is responsible for running up these debts but .I am surprised that all the credit card companies let her have SO much credit especially seeing it all going out to betting sites every week sometimes thousands a week. Someone should have flagged her as a problem long before now. They should take some of the moral responsibility. In the end she had done so much juggling robbing Peter to pay Paul and transferring balances I am shocked she was not flagged as a credit risk but she had always made her minimum payments on time to cover her tracks.

Having looked at the solutions we can not see many. I feel I have to protect myself & the kids and the roof over our head. Her share of the equity & endowment is now only approx 40k her debts are 130k I am not sure an IVA would suit her as she may not be able to sustain her income for 5 years to make all the repayments & I will not be able to help her financially as I will be covering the majority of the bills & mortgage. My brother has offered to lend me the money (40k interest free) to buy her out so she can offer her creditors the 40k immediately as a settlement. The only other alternative is she declares herself bankrupt still offering the OR the same 40k as payment to the creditors. With house prices falling and her income not guaranteed if I was them I would bite her hand off. I understand it is a long way off what she owes but a bird in the hand in this situation would be better than nothing.

Would the creditors accept 40k or is she just better off declaring herself bankrupt as I do not see any other option. A debt management plan does not seem viable as she will never pay it off.

I hate to see her so racked with guilt and she trying to be as positive as possible, her parents died quite close together a few years back & she has had several friends die in the last couple of years which has shook her a bit.

The worst is I feel so stupid for not checking up on her but when you trust someone you do not bother. She has always done fantastic with our finances until this. I battle with feelings of disappointment, anger & broken trust with the feeling of wanting to protect her & take away her pain of what is around the corner.

Who said life was easy

[debbiw]

Hi Rubberball, Your story made me feel so sad. I can't advise you, but one of the experts surely will soon. Just hang in there! I too run up £30k debt, and my husband knew nothing of this. When I finally told him, he was angry and dissapointed, but he has stood by me, and my IVA was approved in December 07. It will be a long road, but I am sure there will be a solution for both of you. Good luck x

[aguise]

Hi there. I just wanted to say hello and welcome to the forum. Life is never easy is it I agree.
I am not qualified enough to give solutions, I will leave that to the technical experts.
Just so you know the forum is a great support and will answer any questions that you may have, ask anything at all.
How lucky your wife is to have such a supportive husband. I wish you both well.
Others will be along to answer soon.

Ang

Please visit my blog at http://aguise.blogs.iva.co.uk/

[rubberball]

Thanks to you both

[iva.com]

Hi Rubberball,

Welcome to the forum. You have certainly come to the right place for advice and support.

Your wife may be able to offer £40k as a full and final settlement, depending on the circumstances and who the creditors are. To confirm this we recommend that she contacts an IVA firm local to her.

Please let us know how you get on.

Kind regards,
Terry Balfour
IVA.com

IVA.com - The IVA Comparison Site
100s of reviews, All IPs and IVA firms rated.

Use our IVA firm comparison tool to find best IVA firm for you:
http://www.iva.com/iva_comparison_1.asp

[aguise]

Hi again I have brought this post back up the board. Hopefully Melanie or Andy or cattalus will be around soon to advise.

Ang

Please visit my blog at http://aguise.blogs.iva.co.uk/

[roadrunners]

Hi rubberball
again I can't offer advice to you - I wish I could. all I can say is that I have found so much help, advice and sincere messages on here that you have definitely done the right thing in posting
I wish you all the luck in the world in reaching a positive outcome. Whilst waiting for one of the experts to advise, just give your wife a big hug. She probably needs reassurance and a bit of TLC right now
Roadrunners

we'll make it !!

[louisa.s]

Just wanted to welcome you to this forum. Like Aguise I'm not an expert but I'm they will be along shortly to give their advice. It's a sad story but your wife is lucky to have such a supportive and understanding husband. You will find all the help and support you need on this site. Life isn't easy its a challenge but i'm proud of you for standing by your wife!

Lou

[MelanieGiles]

The best thing to do is to take some professional advice now about the options available to you, and the advantages, disadvantages and implications of each one - this is important not just for your wife, but you as well.

I would always recommend that a client put forward a full and final settlement offer rather than a five year repayment plan if this was possible, but the creditors would have to be convinced that this is the best option for them as well.

Regards, Melanie Giles, Insolvency Practitioner for over 20 years.

To have me propose an IVA for you, please visit:
http://www.melaniegiles.com/ivaEnquiry.asp

See customer feedback at:
http://www.iva.com/iva_companies/IVA_Advice_Bureau.asp

[james.c]

Rubberball

Good on you for sticking by your wife.

When I started the IVA process it wasnt the stress of telling friends or going through the IVA is well telling people close to you because you dont know the reaction. When i realised at at to go down the IVA route I had just started going out with some one for 2 months and i told her after the two months, and i said that if she wanted nothing to do with me i would understand.

She said she would stand by me and money wasnt the resaon she went out some one.

18 months later we are still together planning to get married at the end of the year and in seven weeks she will be giving birth to our identical twin girls.

The only thing she said was two points, number 1 - i dont get her in debt, and 2 - she is not involved in the IVA at all, hence we still live separtley becuase we looked at living together but i told her i would have to show my IP what sge earned and that the bills were been paid pro-rate to our wages, she would not agree to this as she swa this as involving her, which i dont mind at all, having said that she as supported me when money as been tight. And in september she is changing her mortgage and is going to extend her mortgage by an amount to give to me if , only if its accepted for a full and final settlement to the IVA so when can live together and move forward with our lives.

Sorry i think i have gone of the point, the point is you are a good man for sticking by her, just promise never to argue you about it.

Hope all goes well and keep us informed

no matter how bad money gets, theirs stll alot more important things in life

[rubberball]

Thank you so much for all your support and advice. The next step is now to sit down & decide on the next move which will be professional help.

[rubberball]

Melanie
I was wandering if you could give me a feeling of whether basically an offer of 40k on her debts would be something the creditors would look at. She has not yet enetred an IVA but looking to do so.

Also If I bought her our now so she has the capital ready for her creditors before her applying for an IVA /Bankrupcy would that be looked upon as dodgy even though it is not. It is only her share of the equity of what she has left but I would prefere to have the house in my name before anything happens. Many Thanks

[rubberball]

n

[MelanieGiles]

I am sure that it would be more than acceptable, so long as she could not offer a better solution by either continuing to pay reduced contributions or paying over her disposable income for the next five years under a contributions based arrangement.

Does the £40k equate to her share of the equity in the property, and is she left with any disposable income with which to make a better offer.

Regards, Melanie Giles, Insolvency Practitioner for over 20 years.

To have me propose an IVA for you, please visit:
http://www.melaniegiles.com/ivaEnquiry.asp

See customer feedback at:
http://www.iva.com/iva_companies/IVA_Advice_Bureau.asp

[rubberball]

Thanks for your reply.

No she does not have any disposable income at all. Her share of the property is 30k approx & share of policies is 10k approx.

I am worried that if I buy her out now it will look dodgy even though it will be for the fair market value. I would just prefer to have the house in my name before it all kicks off but would not like it to reflect badly on her.