Lost for words

[MrsKnight]

Hello forum old & new, do hope you are well n Ive been checking in now n then but had nothing to give in posting replies.
Having one nightmare of a year - house move which was good - but bad for our budget in an IVA & has made things difficult. Things keep going wrong financially - we have no money in the bank each month n its just getting harder all them time. My sister has been in court after 3 years of abuse from a relationship n only went to court as my nephew got hurt n police went to our Dad for consent to interview my nephew when he was in his care. Past 3 years have been terrible for my elderly parents & me to cope with, police social services, NSPCC - regarding me Sis n her Son.
My mum is getting worse with her MS & other problems & i have to be constant tower of support for my Dad whom is 78 - doing well but needs me, I see them every day & love being able to help them.
My Husband has been ill for some time - well years n is in & out of hospital for endoscopy, colonscopy, Full bone Scan, MRI scan & his health is really bad n can barely walk some days. Doctors have not got a clue whats up - but totally respect us & are trying to help.
Then this Summer my wonderful,lovely close Friend whom have been a huge support to us n children have grown up since toddlers. Her Husband suddenly died in a diving accident which you may of seen on the news a few weeks ago. I am doing my absolute best to support her & the children & I love them all to bits.
Then my two little boys - one has had to change schools due to moving house n the other is just starting school too.
Its all been a bit to much n Im the one that gotta be strong for everyone around me - yet there is no where for me to turn n have someone being strong for me.
Sorry I am not pitying myself in anyway n feel blessed to be loved n needed my my family n friends - I just needed to offload x

[Julie]

Oh Lyns.....what a horrible time you've had. It must seem like one thing after another for you all.

There's nothing I can say that will be make it better, but we are here for you anytime and you can email off forum if you evr need to. You are so strong for everyone but you have to offload somewhere too hun.

Can your IVA payments be reduced at all? You shouldn't have to struggle fiancially whilst in an IVA its supposed to be manageable.

I really feel for you Lyns and wish I could be of more help xx

[kallis3]

Offload all you need Lyns. That's what we are here for, to give support.

You have had a really tough year by the sounds of it, and I do hope that it starts to improve soon.

I am sure your kids will be fine - kids are very resilient and they will soon make friends.

I hope your hubby gets better soon and that they find out what's wrong with him. That's half the battle, just knowing what it is.

I am really sorry for your friend too, and it sounds as though you are being a really good mate to her.

You know where we are any time.

[Pap]

Lyns,

Sorry to hear you're having a rubbish time right now and I'm really sorry I can't say or do anything to make things better.
Just know that we're thinking of you and make sure you look after yourself as well as looking after everyone else.

P x

[Wizzzard]

It's reading posts like this where I feel like a spare wheel on a unicycle ... you feel you want to say summat but can't find the words, or the words you do find sound either trite or patronising. All I will say Lyns, is we are all here for you and if you feel you need to offload or have a rant then let loose with both barrels. We've all done it at some time or other. In the mean time I'm thinking of you xxx

[freelili]

Oh dear hun

Youre human hun, you have needs too. I know its going to be hard but if you dont make you time youre simply not going to cope. We can all sustain everyone else for a bit but only a bit. Youre not being selfish by saying that to your friend, yes, her needs are there, no denying that, you just sometimes have to pull back, concentrate on what you can realistically do for others, its a duty your owe to yourself and your hubby and your two little boys.

[Skippy]

I'm so sorry you're having a rotten time, but we're all here for you xxx

[MrsKnight]

Thank you so much for your replies & I really do appreciate them.
A few days after my post just when I was preying for things to get better & to start calming down, I was called upon by my Dad as my Mum had got into a state & taken a nasty fall.
After putting my children to bed asleep & my prayers not being answered I went over to my parents to find my Mum in a terrible state. The fall mum had taken was due to to many "tipples" in the afternoon n I had to phone 999 for help. Then in the state she was I had to have her sectioned under the mental health act to enable to get her treatment. After many hours in A&E with my dad till the early hours of the morning Mum had broken her shoulder & had stitches to her head. Luckily able to then take her home & go back in the morning to be assessed - no way would she of stayed there anyway. Taking on everything I told my Dad to be honest with everyone & I so was I - but a drinker wont be helped unless they ask for it. We are getting some support now but it all depends on Mum wanting it - though the agony & pain she is in now I think is making her wake up. In this time I felt close to a break down, but Ive regained some strength & managed to help with the cooking - meals on heels so to speak. Thank U so much for all your support & please accept my sincere apologies for not replying & thank U to Skippy for emailing me directly.
Can I just add Ive moved my broadband to talktalk - look on my profile for my new email address - love to all hope your all well x

[Skippy]

I'm so sorry to hear about your mum Lyns. As you say she has to want help, but hopefully the shock and pain will be a wake up call to her.

Don't try and take everything on yourself, share things with your family and friends, and we're all here for you as well xxx

PS I can't see your email address in your profile so is it ok if Andy lets me have your email?

[Cath]

I hope things get better for you. It seems like you are being everyone's rock and need some support yourself.....sending you virtual hugs xxx

[MrsKnight]

Thank U Cath - its very much appreciated.

Skippy - YES thats fine will try n send you one by the link on the profile too.
For some silly reason when I changed my user name it deleted you from my list of forum friends - must get admin to sort! I thank you for your lovely email & everyone support, I rarely get on internet at mo, so much going on n my mind maxed out with everything going on.
Thank U your all wonderful xxxx

[tori]

Oh Lyns - I'm so sorry to hear you're going through such a difficult time at the moment....sending you a big hug, and I hope that things start to improve for you very soon.

Look after yourself and take care xxx

[debtmountain]

Oh Lyns,..I'm so sorry to hear about your mum and I hope she agrees to getting the support and help that she needs right now...You certainly seem to be going through a lot at the moment, sending you a BIG hug hunny...Look after yourself and remember we're always here for you when you want to offload...Take care..xx

[Julie]

Hi Lyns....sorry to hear about your Mum, it must be so hard for you. Please remember we are all here to give you support or just listen if you want to let off steam.

Thinking of you xx

[kallis3]

Lyns, I've been away so just catching up and found this one - so sorry to hear about your mum.

I hope that she can get herself sorted, but as you say, if they won't accept there is a problem, then there is nothing you can do.

With all your other problems as well you are going through a terrible time.

You know where we all are if you want to offload - I think you have my email addy?

You know where I am anyway.