Hi Janez, My husband bought me Kalms at one point. I also suffered stress and depression on and off and it's not a nice place to be. You have to try not to be so hard on yourself. I also lost confidence in myself - I bet that you expect too much from yourself and there is only so much that any person can take on at any one point. Oscar my labrador got me out of my 'dark hole' at the time if it were not for him I don't know where I'd be. You have come so far in getting IVA approval, doing all the paperwork etc was a massive job and all the worry you had leading up to getting approval. I think most men think in a different way to most women to them it's a straight line almost it's done or it's not. If your husband realises how upset and shaky you still are he might enourage you to take more of those dog walks etc. Maybe if the time's right you could let him know how you are feeling, if not, let your GP know. Even just keep letting the forum know because that in itself may give you some relief. Only my husband and I were aware of our IVA (then 1 other person knew a few months ago but only because I had to tell them that we had no money to contribute towards our father in laws funeral costs). My husband was horrified that I told his sister I thought he was going to cry and looked really disappointed with me but we managed to laugh about it later and now both think it was the right thing for me to have done at the time. I always have and probably always will set myself too high expectations of myself and this constantly causes me stress and worry, despite our IVA being over. This is something that I am trying to conquer but maybe I never will. Anyhow, I now have 3 labradors who keep me going and who sometimes seem to give me a nudge and drag me screaming into their happy world when needed.
Just a thought, try telling yourself you’ve come a long way getting your IVA approved you have done a good job, whatever you are worried about to do with your IVA someone on this forum has probably worried about this before and this new problem to you is a new task you can add to your already quite large list of things to check out.
I also am here if you ever want to chat on the phone or by email just let me know and I will send Andy Davie
my phone number to pass on to you.
Hugs
Oscar
Last edited by
oscar on Tue Oct 11, 2011 3:55 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Our IVA's over YIPPEE unbelievable!Seems like yesterday it was approved despite everything
x