I don't like to see anyone backed into a corner, either financially or by emotional blackmail or bullies etc, it is why I post here because I'm all about the little guy having the best chance they have against whoever.
I know you will have thought long and hard about it, and I know that at any one point we all like to think we have a 5 year plan but life does change in those 5 years, ask anyone here who has committed to a 5 year plan in an IVA if anything unexpected cropped up or their life's changed significantly, I think you'd be hard pressed to find anyone who has remained static and all going to plan with no swerve balls.
What I'm trying to say is that of you're thinking about going along with this please remember that if you need credit for anything, need to rent a new house, e.g. get kicked out of a place by a landlord, your current partner gets made redundant and you need credit (he may fail a check as he is financially associate with you, who is financially associated with ex) etc etc
You might find some bank cards you currently have that are with any creditors he has might get stopped becaue you are financially associated (depends how each lender works, more experienced people here could advise on that) that could mean money in your account gets frozen that you can't get access to, sure it would be released later when all become clear (so long as there is no other association and he hasn't taken credit elsewhere in some joint account or secured on the mortgage that is also in your name).
I have been reading here
http://moneyforums.citywire.co.uk/yaf_p ... kdown.aspx
And here
https://www.moneyadviceservice.org.uk/e ... separation
I did wonder what the options would be if the mortgage company came to realise that you both no longer were in a position to service the mortgage if they would advise they are no longer willing to honour the mortgsge - perhaps that is a route,the solicitor might suggest ? I have never heard of it, but I presume he would be forced to sell then or remortgage on his own or with someone else.
I presume he can't do this and can't get a mortgage in his name alone, but has he explored any specialist lenders or indeed the current mortgage company and demonstrate he has been paying the mortgage alone for the last 2 years without your input financially at all, if you both wrote a letter to the lender saying you declare he has been going it alone at the property would they consider removing your name from the property and just keeping mortgage as it is ? Obviously between us he clearly hasn't been managing but that is neither here nor there if it facilitates getting your name off the mortgage, if there is equity (never believe an ex when they say there is non) he could buy out your share ? Have you had this discussion ?
Perhaps these are all points you could discuss with the solicitors, do see the CAB too, they can offer some free advice too.
When it comes to remortgage time or indeed having to possibly take a secured loan in 5 years time if you are still on the mortgage that would require you to agree to that again, once again if he can't afford a secure loan at that point on his own to secure the loan against the mortgage they are going to be coming for your permission again.
At some point he has to cut the financial strings, I'm a great believer that for all concerned that that point is now, to pay a little money now to do this using a solicitor or even if it means advising the mortgage company he isn't coping and they need to terminate the mortgage (or whoever your solicitor suggests) it will be better for all in the long run.
He will right now be a rabbit in head lights and be trying anything to avoid angry calls, debt collectors and bailiffs etc etc so he will perhaps not be acting super rationally,
In 5 years you might want your own mortgage, need a new car, need to oay for something on finance and not want to remortgage or put your name to a secured loan for another 15 years to release the equity, incidentally if you fail to agree to remortgage/secure loan in 5 years he could be breached on his IVA and even if he didn't get to release any equity after 12 more months of IVA payments at the very end of the IVA it take another year before it drops off the credit file, what then you are back in the same situation as today and he refuses to sell.
Interest rates could rise, his mortgage becomes unaffordable and he starts to default on it or requests a payment break/extension this extends the IVA for maybe a year or 2. Or 4 or 10 !! Etc etc and then what, still in same situation. Something has driven him to payday loans, has it been since you moved out perhaps he can't actually service the place and a default on the mortgage is inevitable as there will be no place to turn for extra finance once in an IVA.
I read more here too
http://www.stephensons.co.uk/site/indiv ... abitation/
And here
http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/sho ... p?t=166345
I know he won't want to hear form you but rather than be rushed into a big decision I think politely suggesting he enter into a for so DMP through stepchange or similar will keep the wolfs away (unless he has done that and not kept to terms already).
His firm, which is charging a fee upfront (not usual) will be telling him what he needs to hear to sign the paperwork so they make their money, I know it sounds cynical of me, but any firm that charges a fee up front, is not in it for the client IMHO,they are in it for the money.
Please think this one through very very carefully and discuss with your current partner and perhaps your family too (people external to the situation with no emotional involvement often see things the involved parties do not and can thin a little more rationally. No offence) the risks vs rewards of each step, once you have seen your solicitor and the CAB you and your current partner will have some options to discuss together , so even if you see a solicitor next Wednesday you need time to reflect on that info, so don't say I will have an answer for you on Wednesday I would also take your current partner with you, its good to have both of you hear things as sometimes it can be data overload and recalling everything is a bit of an overload (iPhone voice memo app is handy for this, with phone in aeroplane mode so no calls or texts don't turn it off).
The very best of luck to you, having a big heart is great to help someone out, bit its a hell of a restriction on your financial life going forward for an unconfirmed period of time if you just sign that bit of paper with no other agreements. Ps if solicitor recommends some agreement be drafted,be sure he is the one that pays if, even if its on a credit card that he's about to default on.
Anyway that enough of me sticking my nose in,,,,,
