what will my next step be i am so distraught

[gimmewine]

J d. I don't think there is anyone on this board who is unable to identify with this feeling of sinking deeper and deeper into despair, we've all been there. However, I would take 10 deep breaths, then look at all the posts again and try to pick out the most positive point in all of them, not the negative like omg they've gone bankrupt.

To me you sound a fair way from bankruptcy although you may not get the speedy solution you want. I would follow the expert advice, go on a DMP for 6 months paying what you can afford at the minute increasing to 600 from September when you back to work. It gives you and your partner a breather and your IP chance to work on new proposals if that is what you want to do. Even if you end up having it rejected again, as long as you pay what you can to your dmp you should be ok, it just takes longer to clear.

Remember, it's only money, family and friends are way more important. Tell your partner he is your main priority along with this baby. Anything else is secondary and you will get through it..... together.

Hang in there, the solution will come

[Skippy]

Oh JD, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. Yes, I am bankrupt, but it was the best thing in my circumstances as I have no assets as our home is in my partner's name. If I had assets, I would have carried on with the IVA,although it would have been very hard. I wasn't suggesting for one minute that you should go bankrupt and I'm so sorry if that was how it sounded.

The experts on here are brilliant, and will be able to advise you of your best course of action. The rest of us have all been in scary situations with our debt problems and will try and help (perhaps in my case keeping my 'mouth' shut would be best!).

Good luck, and please keep posting to let us know how you get on, to ask questions or to have a general rant.

Sorry again for scaring you - I feel awful now!

Onwards and upwards!!!

View my blog at http://skippy13.blogs.iva.co.uk/

[pnn]

im going through a iva
my worry now is that were with northern rock 26,000 owed to them
and our loan is less then 12 months old so will we be rejected

[j_d]

Hi Skippy
No no no no no please please dont feel bad i think just the word bankrupt scares me.

I did think that circumstances show best course of action

please please dont keep your mouth shut cos you have very very valuable things to tell me i am sure and i appreciate every thing you say just you replying means the world to me

julie

[scaredkez]

julie skippy has give good advice, but the thing is where do you go when an iva fails or has been rejected look at it positively as i have done i have tried my best i tried an iva and was rejected i opted for a dmp until i knew what i was going to have to do neither scenario got better, it doesn't matter what you offer they get greedier for your blood, not to scare anyone in statistics 50% of iva's fail i know i am going to get a backlash from this but i read lots of forums and so should everyone else and not become biased because one looks better than the other, others like dd hopefully will back me up on this one, BR is not that scary i am about to haggle over my home for me and my 3 children, but ask yourself why are you here, so you want to get out of debt and find a way forward or do you want to be stuck in limbo?
only you can answer that one all we can do is give our experience along with those who know the technical side of stuff, my advice is look everywhere and read everything but don't be scared or ashamed of admitting you are in debt and are looking for a solution, i have fought hard and long for 8 months now and until you and you only can draw closure to this then you will find light at the end of the tunnel
kerri

Please view my blog at: http://scaredkez.blogs.iva.co.uk/

[Skippy]

Hi Julie, I'm so glad I didn't offend you! Believe me, I was scared of bankruptcy as well, which is why I went for the IVA in the first place. With hindsight I might have done things differently and gone for BR straight off as I would be 8 months into it by now! Hey ho, hindsight is a wonderful thing.

Kerri, I have been reading a lot of other forums as well and it's interesting to see how others get on and especially the amount of IVA's that fail. I think a lot of that is due to the IVA 'factories' presenting unrealistic proposals. If an IVA is presented properly and realistically they will succeed. As you say Kerri, BR isn't as scary as it first sounds.

I now feel as though I have a new life, and I am going to make the most of it.

Onwards and upwards!!!

View my blog at http://skippy13.blogs.iva.co.uk/

[freelili]

Hello Again Julie

I was feeling like your husband when I first came here in september, I knew nothing and saw an IVA as 'the answer' and grabbed it with both hands, like many people here.

However I have learned a lot since joining and it seems to me, and this is only an opinion that more and more are being rejected, creditors just seems to be getting sick of the increasing number and are therefore moving the criteria to limits which are out of reach to many. I also realise that the quality of proposal is important and many factory poor quality, uncaring companies are jumping on the wagon, having only there own interests at heart. It also seems that succesful IVA's are dependant on 5 years of consistant and unchanging circumstances and very understanding family and friends.

My circumstances changed and I could not go down the IVA route, I was terrified of BR but as time went on I just wanted an end to the stress and was on my way to court, my circumstances changed again (with the sudden death of my mom) BR was no longer an option for me. I realised what is important in life, the money worries were a walk in the park compared to the loss of my mom.

I started to think about what my mom left me, a happy childhood and lots of smiles, mom and dad were not wealth people, they were ordinary, hard working and had their own problems with money over the years. My dad had his own buisness which failed and they went BR, we moved house, it was probably scary for them but they made it into an adventure for us, we were happy, always. They did get back on there feet again.

What I am trying to say is that you have the most important things in life, your hubby and a beautiful baby. I know how stressful it all is, but you will be able to find a solution, whether its a DMP, IVA or BR. What is done is done you can forgive yourselves and each other, Please take care of each other. We are here for you.

Skippy, dont feel bad your postibe experience of ~BR will help others who have to face it.

Good luck Kerri with your BR and everything you are going through, always thinking of you.

Good luck



LILY

I asked God for a solution and have to live with his reply.

[DebtDummy]

Well, from surfing the other forums scaredkez, I can agree about 30-50% of IVAs end up as bankruptcies. The main reason is the IVA monthly payments are too high; and the expenditure figures are too low.I had an unrealistic proposal and had to opt for bankruptcy. So, unless someone has a very kind relative or friend to give them the extra funds for say 60 months, an IVA can can be a real stretch for alot of people.

Also, certain creditors want a higher percentage; and one in particular is refusing all IVAs on loans under a year old. Imagine!

All I have left is my humour.

[tracy.h]

To be honest with you DD since my iva was failed ive contacted a few different firms,and feel that i would struggle making the payments advised,i realise that you have to make the best offer in order for creditors to except your proposal,but at what expense.Me personaly im worried that because i offered 45p in the £ last time and creditors still wanted my home even if i put my mortgage on interest only,to offer another £250 on top of previous propoal,that takes me up to £830.00 a month,what happens if my health deteriates further and i cant maintain these payments,ok creditors can reduce payments,but when iva is satisfied how will i manage to go back to a repaymentmortgage as i would not have paid anything of the balance for five years,and i would have used a percentige of the equity for iva most people are so desperate to appease creditors they will except unrealitic proposals,as with debt consoidation loans,it really does seem like a way out of the mire,but for how long and reading a post earlier on another forum,when they tryed to remortgage because of iva and adverse credit report,even though they had been with the same company 14yrs they were turned down,then you have to go to a company that specailise in people with adverse credit and end up paying through the nose.
I understand its ourselves that get into this predicament,and yes i agree we have to make the most affordable amount to creditors that we can,but as i said at what expense
im not saying that iva is not the way forward for some people,i agree with the right ip and realistic living expenditure,it works,but i read so many posts from people in an iva that cant maintain contractual payments,enduring untold stress,when realisticaly bankrupcey would have been a more feasable option to begin with.
Oh well ive aired my views,hope it hasnt offended anyone every ones case is viewed on there owm financail circumstances

[freelili]

Tracy h

I totally agree with you, even tho I grabbed IVA with both hands, I only wanted an answer for my problems and I didnt really give a hoot about how much the creditors would get or how I was going to manage for 5 years. I am not happy about what has happened in my life at all but I am grateful that I didnt go down that road now, I really am. I also think that some companies use our 'guilt' to gain from unrealistic proposals, where would these people be without debtors, eh?

LILY

I asked God for a solution and have to live with his reply.

[tracy.h]

Cheers Lily glad you fixed key board and are up and running again x

[j_d]

oh dear eading everyones experiances and comments just scare me more and more

[freelili]

Jd

Please do not worry, you are feeling negative as we did at the beggining, how can you not with what is going on in your life right now? You are trying to sort out your difficulties and thats the most important thing, you will find the right way for you but its useful to know what can and does happen. Debt dummy, skippy and Scaredkez did not know and thought they were in safe hands/doing the right thing/ grabbed a solution with both hands. There is no point in sugaring the pill, debt is a bitch but it is survivable.
Believe me, I am scared too, I still have my debts and am being hounded, I do not know when I will be free but I will and so will you. Scaredkez is going to lose her house and she has three children, Debt dummy has lost her house. We come here to support each other and share our experiences. We want to help and support you also.

LILY

I asked God for a solution and have to live with his reply.

[j_d]

Hi Lilli

Thanks again for your support and kind words.

Julie

[scaredkez]

jd as lily says it is very scary at the moment as you don;t know which way you are going, like the others i would have accepted anything regardless of what the next 5 yrs held, i am so glad that it was rejected as i would never have managed on the allowance the ip had set for me and my family, we have all been in that situation you are now at, i have tried everthing possible before i decided that BR was my only route, it just meant every corner i was turning was getting harder and the debt is still growing with interest being added, i have a lot of material things to lose as did the others but i still have my family and that is the main thing, we will learn to build up the material things again, its going to be hard and very tough on the children, i am so glad i found this forum and have been able to use other peoples knowledge and experience to help me through this difficult time, you will find a solution but you will have to be strong when you realise which road you have to take, DMP's are really for people who have small amounts of debt or are waiting to propose an iva or a new iva when one has been rejected, i took mine out as i tried to get a full time job with better pay, i didn;t get it so prolonged the agony of not knowing what i was going to do i just wish i had had the strength 8 months ago to go BR and be on my way to discharge now. NR tried also to make me extend the terms of my mortgage from 18yrs to 30yrs which would have given me an extra 110 a month, i am sure you can work the math out on that one, it still wasn;t enough to add to my iva pot which still would have failed anyway, i lost a lot of money in ip fees when my iva was rejected also, which was another kick in the teeth when i was trying so hard to rectify my situation.

i hope you find some peace soon and decide on what way forward you are going, as you can see we are all here for you when ever you need us, hang in there and good luck
kerri

Please view my blog at: http://scaredkez.blogs.iva.co.uk/